Thank you all for stopping by and being such shiny happy people for me. I am very happy about the progress H and I are making but I have my feet firmly planted on the ground.. I'm hopeful that what he says will come but have to also keep in mind that things change like the wind in DB world!
As for what I'm doing to reassure him. I swear that within minutes of me reading his email he was at my door to drop off my season pass. So I gave him a real warm and tender hug and small kiss and thanked him so much for the email.. and it was a very genuine moment because I seriously was over the moon with what I'd read mere moments before.
I'm not sure what more I can or should be doing. I am warm and friendly whenever he comes over. I touch him on the arm or his hair.. but I don't generally initiate any hugs or kisses (so that was a 180 in the above paragraph from me). I recipricate (sp?) his hugs and kisses.
H knows I love him. He has known since all of this began. I have told him during the situation that if I hadn't known what a good man he was prior to the bomb I wouldn't have bothered hoping for things to change for the better.. but that I knew the person I was dealing with at the time was a stranger that just looked like my H.
Journalling. Surprisingly H stopped by last night. I guess he was working semi-nearby so decided to stop over. He walked in and saw all the boxes I'd packed and that all the furniture was in the centre of the room.. and
H said "wow, this makes it feel so much more real". And he actually got teary. W2G said, "I know, it's kind of sad isn't it?".. H said in a surprised tone "yes it is.... although I know we're making the right decision". W2G said, "I know you never really wanted to live in the burbs... and if we could have afforded to buy in the city back then we wouldn't have bought so far from there". H said "I don't regret it. This house was great and was a fantastic investment for us.. especially if we get what were hoping to get when we sell".
Then the topic changed to something else I don't remember. The thing that struck me about it all was how he was hit with sadness when he looked around. I know it's probably going to sound selfish but I was glad to see that. I felt like that before I started packing up our things so I'm glad that he's feeling similar.
On to today. The painter is here. I think D2 has a crush on him.. but then she seems to get bashful yet wanting to be near all older men (older than her I mean.. I think this guy is in his 20's). I'm thinking he may be done tomorrow. Crazy isn't it? Then I need to finish packing up the trinketty stuff.. do a thorough cleaning.. have someone come in to take photo's and it'll be on the market!!!!!!!! Yikes!! It seems to be snowballing now.. where before it felt like it was stuck while I waited for painting!!!
