He just called here (at work) and wants to chat like nothing was said last night. I was polite, but didn't engage and I can tell he doesn't like it. He told me that he is planning on taking DS to Oxnard for the Dallas Cowboys training camp - maybe Sunday and then informed me that I would be taking DD to get her school clothes that day. I told him I would have to see what we had planned this weekend and he said "we" don't have any plans and I reminded him that I was not talking about "we" as in he was included, I was talking about me & the kids. He definately didn't appreciate that...LOL. He wants to control everything, but fails to see that by choosing to leave and participate in his A, that its really not his place to dictate my life. I got it.
So then he says hes going to go and called me "sunshine", being facetious. I asked why he thinks I'm being "sunshine?" and he got irritable so I said "bye" and that was it.
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
Once you drop the rope, I think you'll find that it's actually very liberating. It's funny, because nothing really changes in terms of the reality of the situation -- just your "ownership" of it.
This is so incredibly true. I finally feel in control of my future and I hope you do, too, dear friend.
I'm so proud of your strength.
((((((Corey))))))
M: 37 H: 36 Married: Aug 13, 2004 Decision to Divorce: July 20, 2008 Reconciled: September 2008 Current: Ambivalence
This is really hard because part of me wants to get sucked back in soooo badly, but the better part of me is just pissed. I'm just tired of this. I'm tired of status quo. I'm tired of him continuing to give me bread crumbs and I'm mad at myself for accepting them. I have earned better and deserve better...especially from him.
I do not wish to consider someone who would treat me this way my friend. If this is what he chooses, then he will get it...all of it. I hope its worth it.
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
and then informed me that I would be taking DD to get her school clothes that day. I told him I would have to see what we had planned this weekend and he said "we" don't have any plans and I reminded him that I was not talking about "we" as in he was included, I was talking about me & the kids. He definately didn't appreciate that...LOL.
OMG, what an idiot he is. Was he always this controlling? HE informs YOU what you're going to be doing with your daughter that day??? I wouldn't put up with that crap if my spouse WASN'T having an affair. What, does he want to drag you out the front door by your hair, too??
Hopefully the anger will just allow me to keep my distance and not feed into the crap. Now just to stay angry...shouldn't be a problem, LOL!
Tag GF, your it!
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
Don't let him suck you in! By acting like nothing happened, he is trying to hide from himself, I think. He does not want to face HIS issues. HIS affair, HIS gambling, HIS potential child. Detach yourself from HIS crap! Stay out of it!
OMG, what an idiot he is. Was he always this controlling? HE informs YOU what you're going to be doing with your daughter that day??? I wouldn't put up with that crap if my spouse WASN'T having an affair. What, does he want to drag you out the front door by your hair, too??
Neanderthal.
Puppy
Puppy, his mom is a control freak and so is he. In many ways its actually gotten worse since he left. He didn't have to be quite so blunt about it while he was in the house, far more subtle when you are a part of the situation. His life is an out of control mess, so what better way to feel better than to control others, us especially. I have also accepted it for the most part and I'm done with that. Just like his questioning my whereabouts, thats done too.
The consequences of his actions will soon be all too plain.
Originally Posted By: dry_heat
(((((((Corey)))))))
Don't let him suck you in! By acting like nothing happened, he is trying to hide from himself, I think. He does not want to face HIS issues. HIS affair, HIS gambling, HIS potential child. Detach yourself from HIS crap! Stay out of it!
This is right on. By trying to be his "friend" I have actually just allowed this nonsense to continue. He has had the best of both worlds (cake eating...major, cake eating!)and something has got to give. If he chooses OW and that R, then he can have it...all of it. Let her deal with his tantrums and whining about not having any money, and boo-hoo woe is me, I'm a gambler, I have made a mess of my life...wah, wah, wah. Here let me call a Wambulance for you...baby.
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
