Scooter: I would NEVER date a WA spouse no matter what she told you. I have absolutely NO USE for anyone who would do that to the partner they committed to, someone they could lie to and cheat on. If I were you I'd run run as fast as I can. I would be looking elsewhere for someone new.
As for the financial stuff - I think you have some great advice here. There is also a lot of "off on a tangent" stuff that is what is confusing you. I don't think this thread is about alimony and who is entitled etc. Open up a new category if you want to talk about that.
I am in a LTR - over 4 years. I took my hits from the M, luckily I did not have to pay him but we took a split where he only has to pay 1/3 of the kids expenses. Sucky - YES! I did not ask for this split. I had to rethink a few things and racked up some debt for sure.
Josh makes more $ than me, though we always split the cost of everything quite equally. I have noticed myself complaining about finances a bit lately. I've been hit with some unexpected extras that are quite costly (like a $10,000 retaining wall collapsing onto the cottage). I am not working this summer as well. I am not complaining to him because I expect him to bail me out - I am complaining because it sucks sometimes and I'm just saying it out loud. So that's my point - she might not be saying it for you to pick up the ball and run with it.
I liked the comment that if you have more and want to go out - paying the babysitter might be a nice gesture. This past w/e we went out for dinner and a movie. The next day we decided to go golfing (his suggestion). Knowing things were tight - he offered to treat. That made it much more enjoyable since golf is not really my thing any way. I was prepared to pay my own way but would have made other cutbacks this week.
So, that's one way of looking at it. The WAW thing is bothersome, though.
