Quote: For what it's worth, I am 100% with you on NOT bearing any responisibility for your H's A. Yes we all contributed to the lousy state of our M's but the decision of what to DO with the unhappiness, discontent etc. is the responsibility of each individual!!! My H has fully owned that.
I hope that my h will come to this understanding eventually too...right now he's heard me explain it as such and gives the "fine...it wasn't your fault" but that's just words...perhaps it is something we can deal with in c as at home it is simply my thoughts against his. I do understand his "reasoning"...if I hadn't of let things get to the place they were by my actions/reactions then he wouldn't have left...but that really doesn't fly...I do pose it back to him...gee h if I decide that I would like more sex and more socializing but you are just to busy or tired to accomodate that and so I find someone else to fullfill those needs is my a your fault?? indirectly yes but I must take responsibility for my actions and not try to have you shoulder the blame. but most of you here already understand that right?
so I'm feeling a little confused right now...
I think things are going well...
I still get lost sometimes in the fact that although things are different and there is more of h talking and sharing his day etc. it's hard for me to note any other significant changes...why I'm still trying to check and see I don't know...suppose I should just trust that h is being honest about his lack of interaction with ow.
the weather is getting to me...it's just too hot..sleeping at night has become difficult and I find that I'm more easily awoken in the am by h getting ready to leave for work. I think we'll get the ac's in this weekend...wish we could just put in central air but things take time and money..maybe next year.
emt class is going well...I got an 85 on last nights quiz...then learned how to take blood pressure...I'll have to eventually take everyone in the class.
sometimes I'm a little uncomfortable in class..it is after all 95% male...and they aren't just male they are testosterone ooozing men...firefighters, police...
I guess what I'm still missing here is passion...sure it's here on occassion but not with much regularity..but then I suppose if it were regular it would become stale and old and boring...I'm not just talking about sex either..I'm talking about h walking up behind me and putting his arms around me...or h just pushing me up against the wall and really kissing me...I don't know why I want these things I just do.
h plans to be home (or at least try to) earlier tonight..but he will work out in the yard...he's really looking forward to things slowing down with work and with stuff here...after this week he plans to start taking it easy..the big stuff is almost out of the way.
I feel bad for him working outside in this heat all day to then only come home to work somemore...
