TD- thanks so much- thats amazing! i think that is so funny how she asked you to come home- and you just played your db skills with a little humor- he he...
so i wont do this now but is there a point when i say i want you to come home or is this all in his control?
Chris- thanks! i wont force the hot-tub...last time he was over i said "we can go in the hot tub if you want- i need it im sore from hiking"..so i guess i can throw that in there again if the timing is right!
ill keep you all posted
thanks for your support!
Pisces M 31 H 32 M 7 yrs S 5/10 Beginning Contact! Vibes Hot Tub Cheese
TD- thanks so much- thats amazing! i think that is so funny how she asked you to come home- and you just played your db skills with a little humor- he he...
so i wont do this now but is there a point when i say i want you to come home or is this all in his control?
Chris- thanks! i wont force the hot-tub...last time he was over i said "we can go in the hot tub if you want- i need it im sore from hiking"..so i guess i can throw that in there again if the timing is right!
ill keep you all posted
thanks for your support!
Pisces M 31 H 32 M 7 yrs S 5/10 Beginning Contact! Vibes Hot Tub Cheese
i just went for a run and i grit my teeth up this hill and really got my wiggles out...i am very calm now!
i have a SNAZZY outfit to put on- in fact he saw all my new clothes last time he was here and kind of looked through them- it was cute..so i will doll up for sure!
i normally dont take very long to get ready- but i do try to make a good impression- and tonight i will take a long time to do my hair and makeup, etc.
its like a date!
i will really just hear him- he is having some struggles with a new LT at work and im sure his buttons were pushed today so i will be extra sensitive and let him vent.
i got him a card, bike socks (i love socks) and a cute t-shirt that says "i want to ride my bicycle" its by life is good company- a very PMA tshirt! ha ha!~
im spreading my PMA to him----vibes man, vibes...
Pisces M 31 H 32 M 7 yrs S 5/10 Beginning Contact! Vibes Hot Tub Cheese
so i wont do this now but is there a point when i say i want you to come home or is this all in his control?
In my sitch, it kind of came on gradually. Through most of the sep we actually weren't sep in the traditional sense. We had just sold our house, so there was always something for me to do at her house...so there was only a handful of days where we didn't see each other at all. Through the beginning, she would ask me to leave relatively early in the evening, then it got later and later, then we started mixing some wine into the equation and she said you can stay tonight if you want. So we had a handful of nights where I had spent the night over there and on the nights where I wasn't We pretty much hung out together until it was bed time.
This went on for a few weeks, then I had a week with the kids to myself and my Mom came down to visit for the week. I think it was this week where she missed the fun we had been having. At the end of the week we all went to a family cookout and I went to drop her off at her house and she looked very lonely. My Mom saw this and said she would watch the kids that night if I wanted to come back over. It was the next night that she asked me to come back.
I'm sorry I ramble.......bascially what I am trying to say is that it can be gradual...somewhat natural or a statement. Did you ask your H to leave or did he choose to. If he chose to then it is his decision to come home....you just need to let him know that he is welcome to do so when he is ready. If you asked him to leave then something like "I made a mistake in asking you to leave, if you are willing I would like you to come back home". This will likely lead to and R talk....remember your DB skills....
I hope you had a great night last night.....considering we didn't hear from you in the middle of the night, I am hoping that is a good thing :-)
Last edited by TwinDad; 07/22/0812:00 PM.
TwinDad Me 39, W 36, M 11 W - MLC, WAW???? 2 Kids B/G 3 YRS Old Start of the Long and Bumpy Road..... On the verge of piecing.....a new beginning
very well! he came and got me at our house- i gave him his card and he said it was sweet and said he didnt get me anything bc he wasnt sure what do to- i said thats ok...then we went to a nice dinner and he talked a lot about his work sitch which is rally bugging him...i just validated and listened a lot..its interesting bc i used to get distracted or change the subject after a bit of him talking bc i would think he was done with the subject- but he just keeps going and going when i kepp listeneing..anywho- since he got me at my house i asked him to come in toe Hot Tub again- we both smirked at that one- when we got in the HT he started rubbing me and that was the first tiem since we have been S that he really touched me at all...well that lead to kissing and major cuddling in the HT and a few other things...but hew actually stopped us from you know what'ing...but continued to kiss and hug and i said im never letting go- ha ha- then we went inside bc between the heat of the HT and us we almost passed out- then we cuddled on the couch with our doggie at our feet..and we kissed more, cuddled more...he said you drive me crazy, but im not ready yet ( for you know what)..i was just quiet and kissed him..he said these were the best kisses he has had in 10 yrs...then i said you can stay the night and we'll just spoon- he said yea right- just spoon- so he ended up leaving after a bit more kissing and cuddling!
ill see him for some house paperwork stuff this week...so thats where we stand.
to tell you the truth im elated and i guess shocked that this happened- but also a bit guarded and not sure of everything...it did seem a little inhibited on my part too when it got a little more physical..he is also not the type of guy to use intimacy to patch everything up so thats really nice...
sooooo- ideas? what do you guys think? what to expect next?
im so happy and little scared. weird feeling.
ps. thanks TD- he was the one who moved out but i didnt stop him. so i guess he will tell me when he's ready...i do want a definite statemnt that affirms he wants to be back together.
wow wow we wow~!
Last edited by pisces9; 07/22/0805:52 PM.
Pisces M 31 H 32 M 7 yrs S 5/10 Beginning Contact! Vibes Hot Tub Cheese
I am so happy for you....a very happy Anniversary afterall.....you handled it beautifully.
I hope you don't have one...but don't be surprised to see him pull back a little bit or even say stuff like it was a mistake. It doesn't sound like it from your sitch, but it is always a possibility.
It is normal to be a bit guarded. The first time my W and I ML after sep, I was actually shaking...it almost felt like our first time...very awkward.
Congrats on a great evening, I would let him take the lead on a new get together. When you see him for the paperwork, just say something like "I had a a very nice time the other night" so he knows that you don't think it was a mistake.
TwinDad Me 39, W 36, M 11 W - MLC, WAW???? 2 Kids B/G 3 YRS Old Start of the Long and Bumpy Road..... On the verge of piecing.....a new beginning
