One interesting thing that happened with my own parents. And this could possibly happen....
My mother wanted a divorce from my father (he was an abusive alcoholic so this was a very necessary divorce), and when they were separated he met his current wife.
Interestingly a few years ago she expressed extreme guilt over this. She thought maybe I didn't like her because I saw her as "breaking up" the family. Apparently she had always felt a little responsible for this.... even though I had never expressed feelings or actions to indicate I thought this (believe me, it was a relief not to live with an abusive alcoholic!!!). But it's kind of funny how she had been plagued with this guilt for years... even though I didn't have those feelings.
I doubt your OW has these feelings currently, but time can change these things. Once she "wins" there's a chance she may encounter some uncomfortable feelings. Logic should indicate it's not the best way to start a relationship....
As far as that sleazy relative that called, you should have had some fun with that one!!! I would have said something, "Oh that's okay you can always talk to me. We share him!!!!"
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
