You and only know when to give up. Your fellow church goers just see that you are in pain, and they listen to your side of the story. They want you out of that pain. Ask them to just support you.
You need to get some vitamin B6 and C in you. Fortified eggs, fish, and peanut butter. But not in that order.
I lived on peanut butter for 3 months...
Get yourself a copy of The Divorce Remedy. The first 80 pages will help you tremendously. Look I couldn't even function. I was a blob. It took me about four months to get over the fact that she was leaving. Then I got better thinking she wasn't going to leave. Then in the six month she left. I went back down the pit, but I kept eating this time.
The siblings thing again. Do not complain to them about your wife. (Repeat 10x) Write it down!
Only come to these boards once or twice a day. Don't try to read other people's situations. It will make you feel worse. In some cases it may make you feel better. There is always someone in a worse situation than you are.
In some cases you may be lucky that you don't have any contact with your wife. This is called going dark. Do not persue her. Do not stalk her. Do not attempt to contact her. Do not attempt to find out were she is. Do not send letters to her lawyer.
Let her realise she may have made a mistake by leaving.
When she contacts you. Do not ignore her. Answer her questions in a thoughtful caring manner. Think fast, talk slowly. Ask yourself. Is my response going to bring me closer to my goal or push it further away.
The only thing you can control is you. Work on you.
First thing after eating. You need to reflect on what you can do to change yourself. Obviously you have done stuff in the marriage that wasn't good. None of us are perfect. Even those of us who try to be perfect get trapped by being provoked.
You need to change because you don't want to take the bad with you. Regardless of the outcome you don't want to repeat this process again. Your ultimate goal is for her to reconcile with you. Those changes you make might make them happen. It may not, but you will be a better person.
Try to think what your wives key complaints were. I know she said you breathed her air. Did you leave wet towels around? Sox? Whatever it is? You didn't shave right... etc...
Get the guitar back out. I play too. Believe me I became a great musician after she dropped the bomb. You didn't lose your soul, it is coming out. It will come out of your fingertips if you let it on that guitar. Trust me it works for me. I have played all my life. Played for the church folk group. I never played better since she dropped the bomb.
What is your first goal? Would you like your wife to contact you, tell you were she is at, and let you know that she is alright.
Second goal? You would like your wife to at least communicate with you in some manner.
