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All in all a great weekend. My W went out Friday night with her friends so I got to hang out with some of my DB friends after getting the kids asleep. She came home at 10, so I was happy....especially considering her friends stayed out to 3:30. In the past she would have likely stayed out that late...which wouldn't have been good with the Twins B-day party the next day.

We worked as a team very well in pulling off the B-day party which was nice. The W and I did a lot of playing around...chasing each other around like we were in kindergarten....it was nice to be a kid again.

Sunday, we hadd her Mom's birthday./ She went shopping for a gift that morning which is no big deal....what was nice was that she said she intended to do the grocery shopping as well and surprise me (I usually do this so this was a very nice gesture to me).

Probably one of the best things that happened to me this weekend had to do with her Myspace page. During our Sep, my W's ex-H found out that we had sep and decided to start himself a myspace page recently (in the last week).....and guess what my W was his only friend (I think his intentions are pretty clear). This guy's pregnant GF found out about it a wrote my W a message and then made him delete her as a friend. My W told me the whole thing. I am kind of glad it happened....I hate being in the position of wanting to kick some butt, but knowing I have to trust my W to make the right decision. I am just glad that she was completely honest with me about the whole sitch. I didn't really feel threatened by him so much as I didn't like the idea of some one trying to be a vulture on our M


TwinDad
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Hi! Sounds like you had a great time this weekend. I hope the kids did too LOL

I know how you feel about vultures! Some people have no respect! I think that both you and your W handled the sitch wonderfully.


Jen *The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present*

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Thanks Jen,

The kids had a great time...even though they were spoiled ...big time! One of the best parts was this was the first year where they truly understood it was THEIR birthday. Whne my S woke up we asked him if he knew what day it was, he said "Its....its....my.....birthday". Very good stuff indeed


TwinDad
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That sounds great!

Glad the party went well. You had faith in your wife and it paid off especially with your wifes actions which are showing commitment to you and your marriage.


M- May 2006
D - Aug 2010
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TD- this sounds so nice- a true family and you are really seeing her actions that show you how mcuh effort she is making too....
how fun to have twins- soo cute and tiny!

im happy for you \:\) and im sorry about yucky vultures- there are pleanty out there but you are the eagle! (smarter, more elegant and patient!)


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Quote:
im happy for you and im sorry about yucky vultures- there are pleanty out there but you are the eagle! (smarter, more elegant and patient!)


Thanks Pisces! that is very sweet to say....and I am off the endandered species list now too......lol


TwinDad
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ha ha ha! that is actually a very funny coincidence...you were endangered for a bit but not anymore \:\)


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Originally Posted By: TwinDad
I am just glad that she was completely honest with me about the whole sitch.


That's EXCELLENT, TD. Who cares about vultures if your wife is swatting them away with a tennis racket, right?


It is in the shelter of each other that people live.--Irish proverb

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"Lessons in DBing.....Cheeseless Tunnels and Acting As-If"

Just thougt I would posta little "blog" about last night. Things have been going very well in my sitch and I actually feel happier than I have in a long time. We had been looking at houses lately to move into yet again and one of the houses required a good bit of work but was an excellent price. We looked at it yesterday and then went out, so we never got to discuss it. My W then brings it up wheil we are in bed and I express a couple financial concerns about it presenting in a new way that she seems to respond to much better. Despite this, she pushes me away and says "go to sleep".

I decide to let this wash off back and not worry about it, but I can tell she is upset about it not looking like we can get this house and frustrated. I roll over and turn the fan on and then ask her if she wanted it blowing on her (figuring I would just go to bed)......

No response. I wait a couple minutes and then say "huh" as in could you at least answer me it is a simple question.....Cheeseless Tunnel #1

A couple minutes go by and I say "Ok honey, whats wrong" followed by no response and then followed by me saying "huh" with the same response.......Cheeseless Tunnel #2 (where is that cheese....lol, I know it is dark but did I go down the same tunnel)

A few more minutes go by and I turn off the fan and just lay there, fuguring if she is going to say something then she will just say it.....no response for a while.....Cheeseless tunnel #3 (does that make 3 blind mice)

A few minutes go by and she just says "I just want to go to sleep". I respond, with "that is fine, this started with a simple question about the fan and you decided to be rude to me, I didn't deserve to be treated like that"......a 180 for me

So we both slept through the night and I told myself that I was going to act "as if". In the morning, I could tell she was tense, but I continued to be upbeat. We both had a doctors appointment to go to and I continued to act as if. She started to smile more and by the time we left she initiated a hug before we went to work.

This stuff really does work, you just have to be able to look at yourself and decided what is working and what isn't.

Thanks for letting me share


TwinDad
Me 39, W 36, M 11
W - MLC, WAW????
2 Kids B/G 3 YRS Old
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wow- you really dont like cheese- ha ha
but the important thing here is how fast this changed and you were able to see where the cheese was! and you didnt bother her anymore about why she was snappy at you. you just stated what you needed.

good work- im sure that gets tricky sometimes!


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