breton, I understand what you are saying...I do think that at some point and time, the WAS probably does feel a sense of remorse, and maybe even loss, at what he/she has done.
When my exH first started talking about a reconciliation, he said that he had noticed changes in me and that he liked those changes. For me, however, those changes meant that I was no longer seeing him through the rose-colored glasses. I was seeing him for who he really was.
I especially agree w/ your last sentence...I think that very often the LBSs do fare better than the WASs. My exH married his OW. He does not seem to be any happier w/ her. In fact, my kids tell me that he talks just as ugly and hateful to her as he did to me and he is still drinking. This is a sign to me that he is just not a happy person...at least I know our m failing really wasn't ALL my fault...lol. I, on the other hand, am very happy w/ my life and I am excited about what the future holds for me/us!
