Wii, I had dinner with a bunch of the players from a coed softball team I am on last night. One of the women was telling me about her Orthodox Jewish husband who she divorced 4 years ago. He just filed to not have to pay his child support anymore after 4 years. His reasoning, he is now with a man and his new companion doesnt make any money and he has to support them both......
Before you ask, no he is not Orthodox anymore, I believe he went out of faith...........
My point in that story is that she told me that for 2 years she questioned whether his choice had anything to do with her or not. She didn't figure that out really, she just got to a point where she didn't give a crap anymore what his reasoning was or what caused it. She said one night she was saying her prayers (as the orthodox Jews do a lot) and she had this epiphany. She suddenly became overwhelmingly clear that we each make our choices and there is no one to blame for those choices but ourselves. She told me that God spoke to her that night and told her to let it go and stop questioning herself.
Believe me I am not telling you this in questioning whether you have done this for yourself. More because it reminded me a lot of your sitch and a lot of the conversations we used to have in the infidelity forum. I believe we all sometimes think we are alone in our predicament, but we aren't, there are always others who share our experiences.
