Just caught your title and wanted to respond since I'm one of the few people around here who lives in your area. In fact, at this point, not sure of any others.
I live in Niagara and have been on the bb for nearly 7 years. I did not save my marriage but I tried really hard. Have moved on with my life but still encourage anyone in the early stages to do their best to try to save the situation.
I would most certainly go to marital therapy especially if my spouse agreed to go. Finding a solution based therapist is not that easy. I would start by asking family/friends if anyone has gone to a C that they felt really helped them. I was lucky to find one through my ex's insurance. But it was just dumb luck. You could try calling some of the family counsellors in the Yellow Pages and ask about their philosophies.
The most important thing is to do this for yourself and your spouse. Do NOT do it just because of your job. Cops have as many marital problems (or more) as the rest of us and it should never be looked at as a weakness to get help for one's marriage. In fact - it is a sign of insight and intelligence to put one's R as a high priority.
I had a cop friend who did not get M help. His wife cheated on him with a fellow cop. One year later my friend committed suicide. I wish to God he had got the help he needed at the time.
Please look for a therapist. Maybe you could even go alone first and see if they share your philosophies before taking your wife along. Do keep us posted. Many people here will help you make the right decisions.
