But then again, I do not know this woman anymore. Like I said above, she has fuzzy logic.
But I have see no reason for her to run with them.
I was thinking that at one point, I would tell her, "You have let your relationship with Tom dictate how you treat me. That is just sad. You just do what what you feel is in your heart. I will just have to protect me and the girls as best I can."
H4H,
I have noticed that you use your wife's boyfriend's first name when you talk to her about him, and that all of your convos with her about him are respectful of him -- almost deferential. While I do not recommend "running him down" (all the experts agree on this), as she'll only defend him, I DO think you give him TOO much respect.
I took to calling my wife's 28 year old boyfriend "the McCall kid." But you may want to just call him "your boyfriend."
Also, I hope you use the word "affair" frequently in your conversations with her. I haven't seen it at ALL in how you relate those conversations to use, and it's important that you call a spade a spade, and force the unfaithful spouse into a crucible. There, you cannot control what choice they will make, but you CAN have some success framing the "four corners of the box," so to speak.
(OK, so I just mixed my metaphors and implied that a crucible has four corners, but you catch my drift . . . )
)
