Believe me whan I say this Tink, I am no longer her doormat and I pointed this out to her. I won't just take her back at whim!! If she ever decides that maybe she wants to give us a try, well then she has alot to prove to ME!! I am tired of taking everyones s^&% because I used to be the type of person who was afraid to speak up because I did not want to hurt anyone's feelings...NO MORE!! Nice guys always finish last and I am tired of coming in last. I personally don't care one way or the other anymore, not saying I don't love my W, but am prepared either way. It will be hard knowing if she does get the D that it is a forever comittment so to speak.
I will be around as a friend but not readily available. I feel I am entitled to help her out on the DUI because it happened while we were still married, maybe I am wrong here?
I would love it if our R did work out, it would take an awful lot of work from BOTH of us, but that is nowhere near so I am not worried about that.
Believe me whan I say this Tink, I am no longer her doormat and I pointed this out to her. I won't just take her back at whim!! If she ever decides that maybe she wants to give us a try, well then she has alot to prove to ME!! I am tired of taking everyones s^&% because I used to be the type of person who was afraid to speak up because I did not want to hurt anyone's feelings...NO MORE!! Nice guys always finish last and I am tired of coming in last. I personally don't care one way or the other anymore, not saying I don't love my W, but am prepared either way. It will be hard knowing if she does get the D that it is a forever comittment so to speak.
I will be around as a friend but not readily available. I feel I am entitled to help her out on the DUI because it happened while we were still married, maybe I am wrong here?
I would love it if our R did work out, it would take an awful lot of work from BOTH of us, but that is nowhere near so I am not worried about that.
Ted
Ted...
How did the interview go?
Good for you, you are really beginning to detach this is good I am proud of you. You have come along way in a short period of time, take some time to reflect on it and keep your plans & goals your path. Make sure though to do this in a way of not being a jerk, but a confident man ya hear me brother?
It is okay for you to be concerned about her going through the DUI and to be there for her, but keep in mind she did this to herself she must accept it on her own, kinda like what she is doing now it is not your problem she must walk that walk.
Well W called me tonight and we had "the talk" I did not fight her but I did plant some seed of doubt. There is some doubt on her part but I don't think it is enough. All she kept saying was that she is done and she does not want to try anymore, and if we were meant to be together then it will happen buit she would not marry me again?!?
I will post more tomorrow I am going to try to get some sleep.
Well W called me tonight and we had "the talk" I did not fight her but I did plant some seed of doubt. There is some doubt on her part but I don't think it is enough. All she kept saying was that she is done and she does not want to try anymore, and if we were meant to be together then it will happen buit she would not marry me again?!?
Jonzy, move forward. if this is what she truly said then it's all jibberish. Don't hinder things, don't push things. Just let them move forward.
I know all this stuff is jibberish and all of that but she still has filed and wants to move forward with the D! I am not sure what else I can do right now. There is some doubt when she speaks and she tells me that she is so pissed off right now for the things that have happened. All I did was validated all her feelings and told her she had every right to be pissed. I so wish I had the money to have a session with Michelle but I don't have 5,000!
Maybe should call a coach and talk to them!? I just dont want her to throw 13 years away just like that over something that can be worked out!
Well just got back from the gym and HOLY S*&t did I kill the weights tonight! I love the feeling after a great workout, the high is better than drugs, now if I could only teach myself to be this way all the time!
Had called the W this PM to see if I could come over and get my copy of Birth certificate and HS diploma for my job interview! She said I can come over Saturday to help her go through the garage and find it with her, sounds like a date to me For the job interview I made it to the second round now, out of 150 applicants, now I have to take a polygraph...OMG all the secrets are going to come out now!!! Once I get passed that then I go in front of a 5 member panel and my psych test, seems like a lot to go through to become a SRT member at a correctional facility! I am pumped about it though should be interesting.
Trying to stay active as possible to keep the mind occupied so as not to think to much. Going to start training again in Jiu Jitsu to polish some of my leet skillz, gosh I feel like I am about 21 again. Talked to my old instructor and he conned me into it, he needs a sparring partner for his upcoming fights, should be fun.
Well just got back from the gym and HOLY S*&t did I kill the weights tonight! I love the feeling after a great workout, the high is better than drugs, now if I could only teach myself to be this way all the time! Ted
Ted, I hear that. You probably can teach yourself to feel that way anytime.
Try this. If you are feeling angry or down a bit. Stand up and start bouncing on your toes and really shaking your wrists aggressively. It gets the blood moving and in a few minutes you should start to really feel better.
Seriously - try it before yo knock it.
Here's an idea too. If you find yourself having a hard time controlling your emotions around your W maybe you can work out before you are around her? I mean obviously this would have to be planned times that you are around her like your little "date" that is coming up. Work out on that day as close as possible to when you are going to meet her. That should rally help with your positive attitude.
I'm interested in learning some kind of marital arts too. I want to just to help me control my emotions as well as for my health. I just need to find a trainer that I'm comfortable with. I never really looked into it before. Too much street fighting I guess in my youth lol. Any advice on what to start with? A friend of mine recommended Aikido.
- Scott
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Hey scott how are ya? When I first started in martial arts I started with Tae Kwondo, really easy for the beginners and gives you a pretty good work out. I then progressed into shorinryu Karate which is more of a defense than offense, but can be used both ways. My instructor was great and they teach you how to control your emotions and good stuff like that. Jiu Jitsu for me is just straight brawling and I love it. I get to take out my frustrations on people! Any martial arts is good it really teaches you self control which is why I decided to get back into it!
I did not fight her but I did plant some seed of doubt. There is some doubt on her part but I don't think it is enough. All she kept saying was that she is done and she does not want to try anymore, and if we were meant to be together then it will happen buit she would not marry me again?!? 
For the job interview I made it to the second round now, out of 150 applicants, now I have to take a polygraph...OMG all the secrets are going to come out now!!! Once I get passed that then I go in front of a 5 member panel and my psych test, seems like a lot to go through to become a SRT member at a correctional facility! I am pumped about it though should be interesting.