I wanted to let you all know how things went down tonight. Happy to say that it was very uneventful. H calls at 11:55pm but I don't pick up the phone. He leaves a message about how he thought he got to sleep in the house one more night and he wants in to get his clothes and stuff. If he had came to the porch he would have seen that I had suitcases packed and waiting for him.
He comes to the door and my Dad answers. He says that he wants in the garage. My Dad tells him that he had 2 weeks to get his things out of the garage and it is too late at night for that. H looks for the "hidden" key. But little did he know that I took it away this evening. So H gets in his car and drives away. Not sure what else may be in store, but thank goodness that is it for now.
lwb--I have been saying for several months now I am suspect H is on drugs. Unlike some of the WAS here, mine showed NO signs of a MLC or anything strange until I started to suspect OW. It was literally a drastic change overnight. He turned into someone I loved and who loved me to someone who was a jerk in a matter of one day. A lot of his behavior would be easily explained if drugs were involved. But I will never know.
Let me try to explain the D thing. The judge signed the papers on July 2. I have the divorce decree and by all acounts of the law I am divorced. However, H or I have 30 days to appeal the court and contest the divorce. So the divorce wont' be final until August 2nd. Nothing will happen on August 2. H doesn't even know that he could appeal and I sure am not going to do it. It really doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me. I also can't believe that from May 19 when H and OW told me they loved each other and H wanted to be with her until now has only been 2 months. I had no clue someone could get divorced that quickly.
Me-31 H-38 M: 5 yrs T: 7 yrs No kids Went to Prostitutes 10-1-06 Found out about OW 12-24-07 Bomb on EA/PA: 1-2-08 OW ended it with H "for good" 3-8-08 OW is back 4-19-08 H and OW tell me that they are in love 5-19-08 Filed for divorce 6-5-08 Divorced 7-2-08
Hi Sara, So glad your dad was there to deal with H. I hope he can stay with you for a while.
Whether it's drugs or not, H's actions are simply not rational - honestly, it scares me to think about him pounding on your door in the middle of the night. Please keep taking care of yourself, including being mindful of your physical security.
Your lawyer's refusal to offer you guidance about H's belongings really infuriates me. What the h3ll is that about? Isn't the L there to support you and your interests? If it was me, I would leave H's pile of cr@p in the garage until the Magic Date of 8/2, then move it to the curb a few days before trash day - and tell H that if he wasn't going to come pick it all up, I knew someone else who would....
Thread #10 22 year M, MLC, Piecing since 1/07 Goal: Live with confidence & enthusiasm!
Whether it's drugs or not, H's actions are simply not rational - honestly, it scares me to think about him pounding on your door in the middle of the night. Please keep taking care of yourself, including being mindful of your physical security.
That's what I'm thinking too. And I am so glad your dad was there to help out, too!!! Glad that it sounds like it worked out ok so far (well you know what I mean it could have been worse I think); hope that will continue!!! ((((Sara))))
I appreciate all of your concern. I honestly dont' think H would ever law a hand on me. He does not want to get arrested. That could have him lose his job and any chance he may have of getting a better job. But still he acts so strange, so you never know.
I didn't explain my L's comments very well. When I asked her about H's crap in the garage, she said the first concern she had was getting H out of the house. Once he was gone she would talk to me about his stuff.
Me-31 H-38 M: 5 yrs T: 7 yrs No kids Went to Prostitutes 10-1-06 Found out about OW 12-24-07 Bomb on EA/PA: 1-2-08 OW ended it with H "for good" 3-8-08 OW is back 4-19-08 H and OW tell me that they are in love 5-19-08 Filed for divorce 6-5-08 Divorced 7-2-08
Latest update: H called me sometime today while I was out and left a message on the answering machine. BTW....whoever suggested that I change my cell phone number and not give it to H...THANK YOU!
He leaves this rambling message and is using this sweet voice. He says that in the bag I had packed for him and left outside last night, I didn't put in any underwear for him (I swear I didn't do that on purpose, I thought there was some in there) and if he could please come by when he is done after work to get it out of the garage. He also says that he has found an apartment but can't move in until August 1. (Why he is telling me this I am not sure). Then he just kind of babbles on about some random stuff for about a full minute.
Meanwhile I am finally feeling GOOD! I don't have to hide my things anymore. The house is mine. When I came into the house after being out in the morning, I didn't have to think "Oh Lord what mess did H leave for me today" I knew what mess was in the house...the one I made! I finally am feeling a tad bit normal for once.
Me-31 H-38 M: 5 yrs T: 7 yrs No kids Went to Prostitutes 10-1-06 Found out about OW 12-24-07 Bomb on EA/PA: 1-2-08 OW ended it with H "for good" 3-8-08 OW is back 4-19-08 H and OW tell me that they are in love 5-19-08 Filed for divorce 6-5-08 Divorced 7-2-08
So glad for you to have some peace at last. So can you leave the garage door open and leave it at that? Or do you have to see him so he can get his underwear??
