I've also gone round and round with myself. I guess it's easier in my sitch because W did this before under identical circumstances, so I keep reminding myself that it's something in her, not me. Remember when I was re-reading letters and everyone came down on me for keeping them? Well, I was re-reading them to remind myself that she has her own demons and that's what caused things to disintegrate.
I should add that this post is pretty accusatory towards the dumped spouse. Take it with a big grain of salt! Cheating just isn't right - no excuse.
For a long time I didn't get what was going on, but now I'm really thinking hard about why I chose to be with W and I wonder if there's stuff there I'm not completely admitting to myself. She was gone a lot and pretty much took care of herself - did I choose being with her for those reasons? Not sure, still thinking.
Hey, you like all the same things i do - we'll definitely have to plan a hike or something sometime. Do you skate ski by any chance? I ended up going alone last year cause I couldn't find anyone to go with. Usually go up to royal gorge by Sugar Bowl.
Anyway, be gentle with yourself. Ultimately you tried and he didn't.
