Me: 40 H: 43 H had EA from 2/06-9/06 Bomb 5/06 Piecing since 9/2006 3/2008: Boundary setting 7/2009: Boundary crossing~dropped my own bomb. 8/2010: Marriage finally on track!
I've had someone recommend I read through your sitch and ask you to read mine and comment. I will have to read later, as I'm at work. But I hope you find it worthwhile to pay if forward by helping me. Thanks in advance for your help!
Me 45, H 46, S 23, M 26, Together 30, Bomb 6-2-08, S 6-19-08; H left 12-29-08. H home 12-09, Still MLC in 2012! Me- I have my big girl panties on. Bring it.
Yes, In the newcomers forum. Its called The Wifey - Still working or something like that. I'm going to read the entirety of your sitch. Would definitely appreciate your input.
Me 45, H 46, S 23, M 26, Together 30, Bomb 6-2-08, S 6-19-08; H left 12-29-08. H home 12-09, Still MLC in 2012! Me- I have my big girl panties on. Bring it.
Update time! Just a few things goin' on in RobLand lately....
Ceramics class is fun, although I haven't really gotten the hang of the wheel yet. Most of my efforts end up getting wobbly and eventually collapsing under their own weight. Well, that's OK, challenges are good for the soul.
W is having a really rough time at work lately, feeling very stressed and under-appreciated. Naturally I am being supportive, offering suggestions (but not "fixing" ), and trying to keep some fun diversions lined up for us.
I'll give you one guess what aspect of our R is the first thing to go when W gets all stressed out.... Well, the lesson for me is to not take it personally, that's where I would have blown it in the pre-DB days. So, not a huge deal - just practicing my PMA, along with remembering the ol' mantra "Time and Patience".
Home ownership is adding a little stress ATM too. Don't think I have mentioned this before - our house, which we had custom-built 12 years ago, has to have all of the siding replaced. The stuff they used back then is called oriented strand board - think planks made of fancy particle board - which it turns out is utter cr@p. Hundreds of thousands of houses around the country are now faced with this junk rotting to pieces - there are places I can poke my finger right through it. We got a "token" settlement from the manufacturer, but it only paid for a small fraction of the replacement cost. It's always something!
D16 is gearing up for her Junior year of HS. She's already got piles of summer reading to do ("classics" like Wuthering Heights and Tess of the D'Urbervilles - ick!) And of course she's already falling behind and we're having to get after her about it. Gonna be a fun year!
Thread #10 22 year M, MLC, Piecing since 1/07 Goal: Live with confidence & enthusiasm!
I don't think I have ever posted to you before but just wanted to let you know that I thought it was a sweet "touch" that you used your anniversary in your name. I am trying to read all of your threads to see what wisdom I can walk away with.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
I'll give you one guess what aspect of our R is the first thing to go when W gets all stressed out.... Well, the lesson for me is to not take it personally, that's where I would have blown it in the pre-DB days. So, not a huge deal - just practicing my PMA, along with remembering the ol' mantra "Time and Patience".
I'm guessing this is ML, right? We-el, I'm with your W on this one. When I am stressed out, lots of things to do, I don't want to. Then if I feel my H wants to, ML becomes another item on my "to do" list. Which takes out of it all the fun out of it.
I know you will do well on this front, but I thought I'd give you the list of things **I** like when I'm stressed out and sinking in a list of jobs to do, Maybe your W might like one or more of them?
1. I have a long bath and H comes up to scrub my back for me 2. H pours me out a glass of white wine with ice and listens to me while I talk, looking at me and nodding as I do 3. H asks me "is there anything I can do" when I'm running about like a headless chicken 4. Also when I am running about doing the boring housework stuff H will get up and start doing things too. I feel he's helping then.
Really it's a mix of him taking on some of the jobs I would do and me chilling out, then I'm all relaxed and happy and ready to get into the itsy-bitsy nighties And Rob, I'm 100% SURE you like the idea of your W in an itsy-bitsy nightie!!
Bomb (ILYBINILWY, don't want to be married)Sept05 Seperated Sept/Oct 05 Oct 06 - H recomitted July 11 - I am now a WAW.
), and trying to keep some fun diversions lined up for us.