1. My guess is you STILL haven't read divorce remedy. 2. My guess is you still didn't read any of the other books. 3. I get that you are busy and stressed, but they WILL help. 4. Why do we know all of this? Because we READ the BOOKS. lol
Let me send you a few urls, you may find them more inviting than a text book
Advice from the Beautiful Penny Tupy <-- Not sure why this web forum is parsing [censored] as censored, but it is...message me for the address, Penny is beautiful and brilliant, well worth a read!
Buster, you have all these great questions, and we know the answers, but the fact is, for the most part, we are just READING books TO YOU. The next step in your path to maturity is reading on your own.
I have collected some good articles above to give you a boost, but you really need to pick up Relationship Rescue and a few others.
Please read them before you ask further questions, you will find many of your answers in there.