Thanks Ian~ No it wasnt an attack. Is that a 180 for you PHIL? Is what you are doing working? Is is taking you closer to your goal? I can remember my seperation like it was yesterday... my kids when they were little not so much... SAD BUT TRUE!
I used to pray to GOD~ to help me love my H less so it wouldnt hurt so bad...
he answered my prayers ,, but I dont love my H less ... As a matter of fact I love him now more than ever.
HOW did he answer my prayers?
He gave me strength, he gave me hope and this online COMMUNITY! I am still me just a better stronger version of me. I too used to turn the other cheek. That is what GOD would want me to do right? Not so much .... God does not put us here to suffer at somone elses expense. I believe he puts us here to enjoy life and use our gifts for good and not waste them.
You are a wonderful caring Man.... and for her to drive by you and not so much as smile and then proceed to take her laundry.
~WOW~ pray for her... I prayed for my H.
He had OW and he had a Tattoo of her name on his chest... their affair had been @ 3 weeks when he did that. he still came home to visit us and she lived too far for him to see her much.
The day I discovered the Tattoo? ( BTW~ 2 years ago Fathers Day.. see still remember every detail... )
I told him how I felt... no anger , no tears, and how I had given him 3 healthy beautiful children and in 3 weeks this "person" got her name aboce his heart was beyond me and that I wished him well and that he would be happy. I told him ... I hope one day you call me and tell me you know what ALI~ I AM HAPPY! When that day comes then I too will be happy. And I Prayed , and prayed and prayed to GOD~ I prayed this ... Please GOD HELP MY HUSBAND TO BE HAPPY AND IF IT HE IS NOT MEANT TO BE WITH ME FOR HIM TO BE HAPPY THEN SO BE IT. bU TPLEASE HELP HIM , CAUSE HE IS LOST.
3 AGONIZING MONTHS LATER HE DECIDED TO STAY AND TOLD ME HE NEVER STOPPED LOVING ME... ???
AND I TELL YOU ALL THIS BECAUSE I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I UNDERSTAND SUFFEREING AND LOVING LIKE GOD WOULD WANT. But please know I also tried my best within the guidance of the book DR~ not the bible. * Well the bible too* To love him but not be his doormat. Lovingly detach and make sure he knew he wasnt going to be cake eating. I plainly told him I will always love you until the day I die. I cannot lie to you or myself and pretend I do not love you anymore but I will not allow myself to be with you meanwhile you are still with her.
So Good morning Phil~ and I hope this starts a new day in where you love yourself the way God wants you to. Doesnt mean you dont love your Wife .... it just means you will love yourself and respect yourself too. All my best to you and May God bless you and your family,,, ~Ali
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