H had 3 year affair and I never knew!

[happycamper]

Keeping the details mostly to yourselves allows everyone to the opportunity to behave with dignity. Think of it as a gift to your children - it's very hard for kids to accept themselves without a positive view of their parents.

Thanks so much for that, really needed to hear that.

We have told our parents now and the children. The children have taken it as well as we might have hoped, they have benefitted very much from the fact that mummy and daddy are friends and are supporting each other through this.

Our parents have been awful. Angry, confrontational, judgemental. I have never known stress like it. Dealing with the split seems nothing compared to the wrath we have faced from them. His mum accused both of us of being very inconsiderate and uncaring in the way we have communicated with them. Little do they know the lengths I am going through to protect them all from the hurt and shock of the truth.

H is very focused and doesn't care as much - he says it is all about the children first and then us second. Everyone else comes third. The children are doing ok and for him that is the main thing.

I can't believe his family could be so cruel. We have told them that this is a joint decision which we both agree is the best for us (absolutely, 100% true) and they all blame H... for what? We're not sure.

I'm keeping all the stuff to myself, mainly for my MIL, still their R with H looks to be on the rocks. My counsellor was right - people think what you want them to think regardless of what you tell them.

I'm so tired.