for your great support and wise words! You are my lifeline.
My heart must be HUGE, like an ox heart: it's breaking and breaking and breaking, and there is still some left!
Quote:
So, GO HOME WHILE YOU STILL CAN!
I want to hope I still can... However I have a bad feeling about what happened today. I guess I've done all I could to push H away for good (looky, I wrote a poem!) . He didn't call me, of course, so I decided to try and call him. He wasn't at home (or didn't want to pick up) and didn't answer his cell.
D17 heard me on the phone with H and asked what did I mean when I've told H I want out. I didn't realize - or didn't care, so enraged I was - that she must have heard at least a part of the convo. I've told her it was related to the project I was working on. Later on I was crying and she asked me what happened. I've told her I was upset because of our financial situation (I was too). I have no idea whether she finally figured what's going on, she can be very secretive sometimes (look who's talking). And I spent all these months acting 'as if" in order to keep it from her! It looks like I've ruined everything in one go...
Anyway, I'm going to sleep now, tomorrow is another day
I ask not for a lighter burden, but for broader shoulders ____________________________________________________ M 46 H 45 D 17 M/T 23 Bomb #1 (ILYBNILWY) 12.06 Bomb #2 (OW) 12.07 Bomb #3 (chose OW over M) 9.08
