I hear ya dodo. It's not right to be looking around for something better. I don't feel good about myself for thinking my marriage is not what it should be. The "taking responsibility for my own happiness" is what I am trying to do.
You may not know my whole story. My H and I BOTH look back on our marriage and even the beginning and wonder if we should have gotten married. There are many key pieces missing in our relationship and there always were these pieces missing. We both know this. It wasn't something where we had this spark at the beginning and lost it. There was never that spark. I do remember being happy and excited to start a relationship with him. Friends were getting married, finishing college, ...good timing. I'm working on it. We both want our marriage to work and be legit. Right now it is not. THere is no sex in our marriage and there hasn't been any for over three years, I feel no more than a "brotherly love" toward my H, I cannot recall a time we laughed together (he can't either) unless you count tickling each other.
