There are people who have gone through divorce who go to Retrouvaille. Some judges require people to go to Retrouvaille before divorce (but don't count on being sent there).
It can be very difficult to get the spouse to go. Many are so determined to get divorced that they refuse to do something that might put a doubt in their minds. But it is a tragedy for the children when they won't consider making an effort.
Most couples walking in the door have one willing spouse and one not so willing spouse. But the program has a high success rate. It is not recommended when OP is involved. In some places they call people and ask both spouses if they will come with an open mind and a willing heart. That is all they ask.
I'll answer that for you, redhottie. I have heard of people going to Retrouvaille after being separated, and even divorced. So, it is never too late. I will be going with my H this weekend.
Sara, about the onions.....when you cook, you cook it your way. When your H cooks, let him cook it his way. Eventually, the kids may say something about it. With your sense of humor, I'm sure you'll be able to get him to see, in a non-threatening way, that the way you cook onions is really the best way. Ha!
I am happy that you will finally be going to Retrouvaille, Didi. I hope you will have as good an experience as I did there. And of course, do all of the Post sessions, they go much more into depth about getting along in a marriage than the weekend does.
As for the onions.....I couldn't hold my tongue. I caught him watching tv while all the cooking was going on, and I said, "Aren't you going to cook the onions?" And he said, "yes, don't worry the onions will be thoroughly cooked." And I said, "Good because I like the onions thoroughly cooked." And they were.
Last night my husband said sadly, "I have a business dinner I have to go to tomorrow night, so I'll be late. I hate going to these dinners." So I asked about it. Then he told me that I could come if I wanted. I said OK, even though he said it would be a drag. Today he sent me the invitation so I could look at the menu and choose my dinner. It's on a cruise ship and the boat will be cruising for 2 hours! This is his idea of a boring dinner?!
So now I have to find a dress, etc. I wonder how many nice dinners he could have invited me to in the past, but didn't. Oh well, I think this one will be fun.
Yeah, I'm glad it finally dawned on him that I might want to go. I think they just think the wife should stay home and do home stuff. But then all we get is the drudgery of life. I understand that I won't know what the speeches at dinner are about, but I can sit and smile with the best of them.
Thanks, we just got back. It was very nice, but crowded. There were a lot of spouses. Yes, I think he was glad I was there. I wore a red dress and a big sunhat. It was a bit much, as there wasn't room for the hat on the boat, but I made an impression. We sat with another couple from New Orleans, so it would have been a very different experience alone. He said he didn't even realize that it was the dinner cruise when he told me about it. They took a picture of us as we boarded the boat and then sold it to us at the end of the dinner. He bought it, so I figure I looked good.
Ha!
