WAW is full steam ahead

[The Wifey]

Ok guys, and I do mean the men here. My H is in the house and I am having a real hard time with the backing off and the going dark. I can also use your input.

My h let me know that he felt unappreciated, used, taken advantage of because of my very bad habit of making plans and letting him know at the last minute. I see what I did to cause a lot of hurt to him. I'm changing, but he doesn't yet see the changes as permanent.

Now I need to know how to reverse this but still do the hanging back and staying dark to give him space and time to figure out his own head. (His words, not mine.)

I was thinking that maybe tonight I would go to the library or go fishing. Do you think, even with his request for space, that it would be better to keep myself busy at the house rather than go somewhere? He often complained how I was always busy elsewhere or just plain gone.

Or would my being out be just what I should do? I just don't know. I'm leaning toward the being in the house but keeping busy.

(((Losing sunshine))) Keep doing what you are doing with focusing on the kids. As much as your w is in a fog, she could never, ever fault you for focusing on the kids except out of her own guilt.