Guys (and maybe the girls) we are still not listening. Listen to ourselves, to our friends, family, co-workers and yes, even the dreaded x. I suspect we have fallen into the old trap of forming responses without listening, coming up with defenses or thinking about something completely different. (What color does a Smurf turn when you choke it?)
READ
Read something completely new, something you never even consider reading. Go back and read some of the High School and College stuff you hated. Recently read "1984", "Slaughterhouse Five" and "Seize the Day."
GO SOMEWHERE DIFFERENT
I'm not suggesting Cuba. Next time you are out and about, go in a store you've never been in. For those of you with lives and time, go see a movie you would never dream of seeing. Watched "Crash" last weekend.
TRY SOMETHING OLD OR NEW
Start walking or running again. Or writing. Go to the Y and take a class. Or find a class at the local community College. Or 3. Finishing up Statistics, after taking Algebra and Math Applications.
MAKE A DAILY GOAL (and complete it)
Even a small one. Spend only 1 hour online. Write 3 pages in the next Great American Novel. Read with your children. Walk a mile. Clean out the junk drawer in the kitchen. Just one small goal; make sure to complete it everyday. I know I am going in some many directions, I feel most days I complete nothing.
TURN OFF THE TV
Go outside. Rake the leaves. Mow the yard. Plant some flowers. Throw the football. Lie in the driveway and look at the sky. Listen to the air.
GO A WHOLE MINUTE, HOUR, DAY WITHOUT THINKING ABOUT THE X.
This seemed impossible not very long ago, did it not? But now, like many memories and thoughts and people and places of our past, they slip quietly into the place for old memories we bring out on a sad day and dust off and wonder?
MOVE THE FURNITURE IN THE HOUSE
CLEAN A CLOSET
FIND SOMETHING YOU ENJOY
If your current career (or lack of one) is not working, think about what you truly want and start moving in the direction. Yes, it is a BIG risk. But it is no more of a risk than being miserable and suffering daily and monthly. Research on the internet, ask people. Stop listening to the critics and listen to yourself.
Life is immeasurably difficult and divorce made it exponentially so. If we envisioned this, we probably would not have signed up. Everything we thought we knew and believed and understood was wrong. We can sit and wallow and talk about the injustice (and I do) or we slowly, imperceptibly move forward.
Major changes have already shocked us, no need to dynamite the whole life process just yet. So moving to Alaska to "live deliberately" might seem enticing, remember there is not internet or ESPN in the Yukon. _________________________
This a great post thank you. I am not Divorced yet but, this helps me greatly as of right now. Peaches
Me 48 H 54 Together 30 yrs M 29 yrs S 24 s 17 EA 10-2007 Denies it every happened
