<<Since she moved out i've lost count of how many times she has told me she loves me. I don't tell her - she absolutely knows how i feel
I think you should tell her back, when she tells you. If she's anything like me, it will kill her if you don't say it, & you just assume she knows it. I know my kids love me, but I still enjoy hearing them say "I love you mom".
What you are calling freedom years, I call her being focused on herself finally. I don't think spending time with an OM is right, but I totally agree with her taking as much time as she needs to heal & then decide if she wants to re-build the M.
Have you read the book "Controlling People". I recommend it highly.
be patient
M 19 years, MC for 8 months, DB'd for 8 months 4 kids; 18, 15, 14, & 10 I was never meant to be a doormat. It took me years of therapy to become assertive enough to stop his abuse.
