Hey, ba ~ missed that post first time around. Nice to hear from you, although I do wish none of us had to be here.
Ali, what's a good job? If you mean the massage, it seems to have pushed him further away - he really hasn't touched me since. And he's been napping fairly frequently, something he does when he's worn out by deciding to leave.
I did end up riding my bike to the beach yesterday and trying out several kayaks. It was so much fun, I'm totally hooked! Reminded me how much I love riding my bike, too - it's so beautiful here in the summer.
I'm trying hard to get myself into a place where I am letting go of my H and my M - expecting nothing, just waiting to see what will happen. Despite my efforts, I still find myself flailing around emotionally - up, down, all over the place - and thinking about the two 'real' conversations we've had in the past few weeks is not helping, as I keep remembering all the things I said that I shouldn't have said.
Guess I'll just have to keep moving forward, as no one has invented time travel yet. I know the kids are sensing the increased tension, but telling them that their father is thinking of moving out won't do much to make them feel more secure.
