We are on a Flat Spiral (?)

[Bagheera]

To me her comment about , "didnt you get enough..?"
Suggests she doesnt get it yet.... she still "thinks' IMO~ that you are just needing a release.......that you only want to have sex to get off.

I agree completely here with Alimari. Your wife doesn't make love to you, NTE: she just has sex, and hurry-up-and-get-it-over-with sex at that. She's treating this like she's the master, and you're the dog begging for another treat. "Haven't you had enough already!?" IF she still loves you, then she's going to have to have a major awakening here in order for things to get better for you.

What if you stuck The SSM in her hand and said: "Read this, please. It explains very clearly the anger, frustration, and resentment that WE BOTH have been feeling for years, and gives us a plan for repairing our relationship." Or something like that. It's worth an honest try.

My guess is, NTE, that it will probably take more than that to shake your wife up and get her on board -- she's far to angry, resentful, and stubborn to want to make changes voluntarily. She believes that if you keep hanging around and putting up with the status quo, why should she change? (She doesn't realize how so, SO much better things could be for her too). You'll probably have to have suitcases in hand, and about to walk out the door, before she realizes that you really mean it and that she will need to fight for the marriage if she's going to keep it.

I hope I'm wrong about that. You know the woman best -- perhaps you can come up with some clever way of shaking her out of her coma.

-- B.