I have very long hair too.... my H doesn't like it pulled back. Interesting.... His Mom is very uptight , stiff hair do etc. etc. etc. You know "MOM"~ mode...
Anyway I see your point. Weird in a way that one looks for that opposite almost. Any good books on the subject?
I myself have read Passionate Marriage and loved it.. a bit complicated but I loved it. I grew up with the belief that my sex drive was "bad". And good girls dont... well they dont so much of anything.
When I met my H I devoured him like an eclair. Sexually I felt strong and I loved exploring my sexuality with him and then I had kids with him and it "magically" disappeared. UUGGH~
Anyway your post has opened up a new way of looking at things for me.. I am definitely going to at least read about it some more. I was in sex therapy a long time ago but I was "recovering" and " surviving" so I didnt get to explore my sexuality too much..
WE have explored fantasies and have a lot of fun with it actually. I am very open and liberal. Last year when I was testing the naughty girl water again..... I picked him up at the airport w/o undies on... in a dress and showed him on the drive home. He loved it and we had a great evening..... I am very open at at the same time I have to fight my internal dialougue. And that is sometimes hard....
I also *( now~) put my H before my kids and yes that sounds like I am a bad Mother in print......
But actually it makes me a very good Mother. It is amazing how happily the home runs when Daddy is happy and Mommy is happy. I used to follow the order that is somehow preordained by who I dunno? First make kids happy then hubby and if there is time left you can be happy too but not before your kids for heavens sake.