Mulesqb - Can the sun shine on a donkey's a$$?

[faithisbelieving]

mules...I can't touch what Bill wrote. Read his paragraph above several times. This morning, I had a conversation with my W. For the first time now, she is crying and apologizing for her behavior...after almost 2 years and is seeing a psychologist. It is probably too late, but, at least she is getting some help for herself. Sadly, I almost see shades of 'normalcy' and wonder if she is coming out of the tunnel.

You hope that your W will get there sooner than mine did and perhaps save this. This is a long road. It does not go away overnight. They do not wake up one morning and tell you "oh honey, I've made a mistake....I'm back...I love you".

Far from it.

Having a 5 and a 7 year old...and reading what Bill wrote, our W's wreak havoc on all our lives and,yes, ONE OF US, must maintain stability. THIS....THIS...is where YOU come in mules. It's a tremendous responsibility and one you can't shirk. I can tell you as can Bill...there will be times that you feel like Atlas and the weight of the world will be crushing you....or, like Sisyphus, no matter how much DB'ing you do, you'll get to a positive place only to have them roll back downhill to some darker roller coaster stop.

But you must continue no matter WHAT the result of this all is. Your kids need you now and as Bill said, they only want to come home and know that there Dad is there...he is OK...he loves them...and he LOVES THEIR MOM. In the worst part of my D, I once told my W that no matter WHAT WE DO TO EACH OTHER THRU THIS, NO ONE WILL MAKE THEM STOP LOVING EITHER OF US.

Your boys are looking at you right now. You are their rock. They will learn how to deal with women based on how YOU interact with your W. Be strong. Detach. Be upbeat. Bill and I CAN say one thing to you...no matter WHAT happens here...you will be OK. You will. Knowing that, be positive...stay strong...let your boys see that you love your W thru her pain and...just be there and love them.

Your going to be OK.

FIB