2008 = Crazy Year (3)

[Hope4us]

H4U

took the time to revisit your old threads. WOW, it is like seeing myself to a large extent all over again. It is amazing that when I looked at Puppy's thread and then revisited yours, there are so many darn similarities.

Oh well, we will see what happens from here on in. WW does sound determined. However, I,like you H4U, will be telling folks this was not my decision and what the "straw that broke the camel's back" was. I am sure WW doesn't think I would do that, especially with our K's, but it WILL happen.

If nothing else, my K's are going to know that their dad did not give up on his family and was willing to try everything. May paint WW to be the bad guy, but I CANNOT NOR WILL I DEVIATE FROM THE TRUTH!!!!! Enough lying and B.S. for one year already!

That is exactly what I thought. I would NOT LET MY KIDS THINK I RAN OUT ON THEM. If/when you tell the kids, make sure you do it in a loving way. Their mom isn't a bad person, just did/is doing a bad thing.

I would just advise to be careful about who you tell. Only tell those that could have an influence on your wife. It will make recovery that much easier when this affair ends, which it will.

Like Puppy says, Keep fighting the good fight.

[lost_in_space]

H4U

Agree on the who to tell point (although at one time I wanted to have a billboard sign put up ). The IL's will be the only others that would immediately be on the hit list if it came to that. As one of my good friends put it, FIL needs to know so he can kick her 42 year old a$$ till she gets some sense. Not that that would happen (the sense part) but the a$$kicking is a definite probability.

You are right, she is not a bad person. I have told her this (when OMW called back in April). She is a good person who has done bad things.

I do not want to paint her out as the witch she is acting like right now, but I am not going to protect her from the consequences of her decisions at this point either. I gave that a shot before (I keep it quiet if she goes NC) but she did not like that arrangement...

Just the TRUTH. While the truth may hurt to hear, I cannot be hurt if I stick to telling the truth.

[lost_in_space]

More stupid thinking on my part...

Can somebody please tell me the sanity / logic / whatever of what is happening when WW is in bed, D10 lies with her and she tells D10 to go to her room because dad will be coming to bed - AND YET SHE IS LOOKING AT D PAPERS???????????????????????????

I am sorry, but that is driving me up the wall almost as much as anything!!!!!

[lost_in_space]

Ok, WW wants to have this financial disc tonight - right? Well instead she makes plans to go out with a GF (not one of the EGF at least, but a friend of the M). WTF????

Thought it was sooooo important to have the disc!!! Oh well, I am busy with S13 tomorrow night (hitting the local stock car races - WW doesn't know that yet) so will have to wait.

[lost_in_space]

I did some research on D today. Only three grounds here. First is adultery and that is my out. Second is physical or emotional abuse. Third is a one year separation. So unless I consent even if she does file we have a long way to go. Sheesh.

[lost_in_space]

Just a quick update. WW was out with GF until 10:30 and then straight to bed when got home. I wasn't in the house (was in the hot tub for a bit) so no need for her to rush off, but oh well.

I came in and spent the next 30 min with D10 on my lap watching TV. When finally went to bed, WW was sleeping, almost on my ptllow.

I gave the GF's H a heads up of what they (WW and GF) may be talking about. He is a good friend and knows of everything in my sitch. Will be interesting if his W mentions what was talked about.

Interesting on the reasons for D I mentioned above. Unless one of us leaves, the 1 year separation may never start. Could happen If both in same home, but have to be sleeping separately. Oh well, no sense focusing on that.

[lost_in_space]

OMG - WW spoke to me. Asked "have you ordered pizza yet?"

1st words in three days.

[lost_in_space]

Comments?

At supper, WW asks if we (me and S13) are going to be home. I say yes so she says she is going out. Ok - no questions from me.

Should I have been more inquisitive?

[bluerain]

I dont think so, if you had asked, would that be pursuing? I think that you did well by not asking.

[lost_in_space]

Thanks br. Thot that would be the case. I have been warned by puppy that this all feels so counter intuitive. I agree.