My wife and I are seperated, here is the short version of my story.
Married right after college, wife had an affair the day before our wedding, she continued for 4 months and then told me about it. During my shock and her apologies we got pregnant 6 months into the marriage (2 months after she told me). I then procedeed to punish her for the next 7 years, verbally abusive, no trust, etc. Well 6 weeks ago I found out about an EA she was having and exploded, completely denigrating her. She then decided to tell me I am not in love you in that way, etc.
She is now seeing this EA and it has become physical. I want to move on, but we have 3 small children and I feel I should at least try to make it work for our family's sake.
I have started working out, going out with my friends, flirting with women, traveling and generally enjoying life.
I have stopped arguing, I have stopped demanding, I am living my own life and am relatively happy. I had a session with a DB coach today and he pretty much told me everything you read here on-line. SOn't chase (which I stopped a few weeks ago), don't argue (since we stopped arguing our relationship has never been more peaceful), compliment her (which I did).
My question is now that her and her new man seem happy together should I hold out hope for a R? If so how long, I want to move on with my life, but I also wish that none of this had ever happened. My story does not seem different than any of the others on this site, so I can give more details if needed, but should I move on or should I wait for her current relationship to end?
I am resigned to the fact that it is over even though I don't want it to be. Any response, even "I don't know" would be very beneficial to me.
