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Quote:
For instance, at my W's place, my D2 needs to sleep in the same bed as D3.5. Here, they dont.


That means they feel secure when they are with you and that you are much more relaxed. Your W will know this as well....this can only help you. Your confidence will come through in their actions as well

Last edited by TwinDad; 07/10/08 02:03 PM.

TwinDad
Me 39, W 36, M 11
W - MLC, WAW????
2 Kids B/G 3 YRS Old
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Neilh23 Offline OP
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i know. sometimes its just nice to hear. thanks TWD....
i hope thinks start going faster sooner....this slowness is agonizing......but i doubt that it's going to go any faster...


ME:32 WAW:31
D #1: 3.5 D #2: 2
Together: 13 M:6
Bomb Dropped: 2/15/08
Sep legally: 6/18/08

"Tommorrow there'll be sunshine, and all this darkness past..."
-Bruce Springsteen Land of Hope and Dreams

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Ughhhh Neil, you are doing great stop being so negative.....lol

When they do get faster, and they will, you may finding yourself having to put the brakes on a little just to keep yourself from getting too excited and "scaring" your W away. I think these iniations your W is giving you about he effects on thefamily is the start of things improving.....it is kind of like her realizing that this whole sep thing isn't all she thought it was cracked up to be....there is a negative side as well. With yuor changes she will likely also think that things prehaps were not as bad as she thought they were either


TwinDad
Me 39, W 36, M 11
W - MLC, WAW????
2 Kids B/G 3 YRS Old
Start of the Long and Bumpy Road.....
On the verge of piecing.....a new beginning
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that's the thing...this is my issue again...confidence, then none at all. LOL..... i think it's because i haven't been able to GAL as much because i have the girls....LOL...not that that's bad in the slightest. The thing this morning kinda thru me....i was sad that my W wasn't with us to celebrate it.

Of course, you're right. She is noticing my changes, plus the effects on the family. She mentioned yesterday that she's exhausted.... I haven't said one word about how that could be different very easily......

i need to stop reading the negative posts.....that sort of sucks the hope right out of me...LOL


ME:32 WAW:31
D #1: 3.5 D #2: 2
Together: 13 M:6
Bomb Dropped: 2/15/08
Sep legally: 6/18/08

"Tommorrow there'll be sunshine, and all this darkness past..."
-Bruce Springsteen Land of Hope and Dreams

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you are so on track Neil- I can see how much more clear you are now and really seeing the small steps our wife is making. This is detachment and I think that is the best way to live. I hope my detachment gets clearer in all areas of my life bc it takes so much pressure off everything. You need a new context except for saying "so slow" bc i think that makes you feel more anxious....how about life is a PROCESS? this is a process- it is going as fast as it should go, and it will change speeds.... (i wrote that for myself too!)


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Neil,

When she says she is exhausted....say yes I know this is very tiring. It is normal to feel the sadness you are feeling...she feels it too. I felt the same thing when I took the twins on a vacation with out my W.

When you feel your confidence slipping just become "neil the teacher" again with regards to your confidence. In order to lead a class of students you need to have a lot of confidence otherwise they will they will eat you for lunch (no matter what age they are). I know I had a short stint as a substitute teacher after grad school and before going in the coast guard.


TwinDad
Me 39, W 36, M 11
W - MLC, WAW????
2 Kids B/G 3 YRS Old
Start of the Long and Bumpy Road.....
On the verge of piecing.....a new beginning
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of course, you both are right. i know i'm not at my best right now (lack of sleep myself...LOL)..and that gets my emotions all tangled up.

good example.....will use that...

pisces....that's a great idea...more positive all around.... Life is a process and it goes as fast as it wants....


ME:32 WAW:31
D #1: 3.5 D #2: 2
Together: 13 M:6
Bomb Dropped: 2/15/08
Sep legally: 6/18/08

"Tommorrow there'll be sunshine, and all this darkness past..."
-Bruce Springsteen Land of Hope and Dreams

Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,834
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Neilh23 Offline OP
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i really think i'm starting to understand this GAL stuff. LOL

was feeling down (you can tell)....allowed myself to cry a bit (yeah, i'll admit it) and then i did something i enjoy....felt a whole lot better.


ME:32 WAW:31
D #1: 3.5 D #2: 2
Together: 13 M:6
Bomb Dropped: 2/15/08
Sep legally: 6/18/08

"Tommorrow there'll be sunshine, and all this darkness past..."
-Bruce Springsteen Land of Hope and Dreams

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Good for you! Just checking in to see how things were progressing. When you start to think it's going soooooo sloooowwww... remember the movement is forward, not backwards!


Divorced 03/2010
Mom to two amazing kids

Taking the road less traveled because those encountered on the way may be just as unique.

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Neilh23 Offline OP
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good point. thanks bridgestone! any other advice/2x4's you can give me is appreciated!!!!! :-)


ME:32 WAW:31
D #1: 3.5 D #2: 2
Together: 13 M:6
Bomb Dropped: 2/15/08
Sep legally: 6/18/08

"Tommorrow there'll be sunshine, and all this darkness past..."
-Bruce Springsteen Land of Hope and Dreams

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