Hi Mandyloo, I am so sorry about how your H is treating you and your son. I just hope for you that it will be all soon behind you, and you can move forward in peace. (((HUGS)))
Here, they round up people who are behind on child support payments and throw them in jail.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
steelersfan, thanks for your reply, the child support have said that they will give him the opportunity to catch up with his payments, if he does not they will notify his place of employment to deduct it from his earnings, if all this fails it goes to court and he could face going to prison, never ever thought ex would turn out like this he would never even put a postage stamp on upside down, he as his hands in so many pies that he would never dabble in before, I think he is being led down the wrong path. His new wifey is on her 4th marriage, each of her ex's have ended up in bad debt before she ditched them, form house repossession to bankruptsy, excuse spellings, she knows what she is doing and she as changed him into her way of thinking and spending, ex would have never ever seen son go without, now he doesn't even send enough money for a glass of milk per day, how sad he is that he would sooner spend it in the pub on her or living the lifestyle he chose before his son. I do hope he lives to regret it.
I think he'll be regretting a lot of things once he is sitting in jail for back child support. He sounds like a stubborn, stupid man, and maybe this is what he needs to get through to him. Not that he will ever admit fault, I'm sure.
Gosh, Mandyloo! I have been following your sitch for so long, and I am amazed at your strength, and your son is just awesome.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
oh and he wanted us out of our home due to the fact he couldn't afford 2 mortgages etc,
If he had two homes, why didn't you get one in the divorce settlement? I am sorry about your XH's behavior. Some of them are just too thick-headed to learn anything.
Mine took me to court because I had been unable to get the mortgage refinanced for our home which was awarded to me in the divorce. Then had the nerve to ask for the house to be sold and the proceeds to be split between us. Thankfully, the judge didn't do that.
Everything happens for a reason, maybe Dad needs to find that it isn't better out there, he needs to realize how good he had it here. Maybe he will find God and that is the most important thing when he finds Him he will know he is supposed to come home.
thankyou all for your replies and comments, I value them dearly. beingme, yes I have been at this a long long time, longer than I ever expected 3 years to the day since he walked and 3years 2months post bomb. braveheart you make me laugh and I agree with you yes he does need hitting with something and I would like to be the one to do it. Anewme, ex has only got two homes because he had the one that was ours and when he left he got married to ow and they got a home together, I didn't get a penny from ex although we were together 14 years we never actually married, we had a son together and just lived happily as if we were married, the home stayed in his sole name, as I was a stay at home mum, ex's choice I must add, I didn't think it fair to put my name on the mortgage as I didn't have money coming in to contribute, how foolish I was believing it would never ever end up like this, he was the type of man that wouldn't do any of what he as done. so he decided, as I predicted he would that because son wouldn't play happy families with him and new wifey that we had to get out of our home, that was supposed to be son's eventually, my solicitor seems to think that this started as some kind of threat that went wrong, she thinks that he probably thought that if he threatened the home that I would force son to have a relationship with himself and new wifey, son is 14 years old and has a mind of his own, he now hates his father and doesn't have contact at all. My solicitor says it was something that he threatened and the ball got rolling and he couldn't stop it. we are in a new home now and getting on with our lives, I don't think I could have ex back, in fact I know I couldn't, what I do want to see though is for things to go wrong for him with wifey, for a man that never wanted to get married he wasn't interested, said it was only a piece of paper and a waste of money, he soon rushed her down the aisle, this is her fourth marriage, she's done the dirty on all the others. I would like to see him do the right thing with his child, ie form some kind of relationship and I do hope he sorts the finances out for the sake of his son. 3 years he has been at this, I suspect it was his fathers sudden death as the main trigger, that was sept 04, there were other work related factors that happened in the year or so before that so we could say he as been at the whole thing for at least 5 years, it is just the way he is with his son that really annoys me, how he can go so long and not even contact him, downright disgusting.
I often read your posts and feel such compassion and empathy for you...you come across as a wonderful, caring and loving person and I cannot understand how MLC blinds these men so much ! It is unforgivable that your H does not have any contact with his son. I can only think that one day this will all come tumbling down on H as a nasty nightmare. I am so sorry you have had to struggle so much financially and emotionaly, no one deserves such treatment !!
I admire you for getting on with life, for loving your child and for still hoping that one day your H and your son will have some sort of relationship. I pray to God that your life gets some well deserved sunshine this year.
Take care and much love to you
Love Cinders xxx
"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus
