......thank her for talking to you. If she'll let you, take her hand, stare into her eyes & say "thank you, W, for talking to me & explaining things to me, I really appreciate it".
H would say this to me, even on the phone.
It encouraged me to want to talk to him about other stuff.
M 19 years, MC for 8 months, DB'd for 8 months 4 kids; 18, 15, 14, & 10 I was never meant to be a doormat. It took me years of therapy to become assertive enough to stop his abuse.
just wanted to say hi as I saunter of to bed. good night
tag, you're it. lol (I was just on your thread, you were on mine, we'd better watch that, or people will talk). j/k
M 19 years, MC for 8 months, DB'd for 8 months 4 kids; 18, 15, 14, & 10 I was never meant to be a doormat. It took me years of therapy to become assertive enough to stop his abuse.
I had C today. I want to send a letter to my bio father telling him that I want nothing to do with him. That I want him out of my life for good.
<<Dear X;
I am not interested in making "amends". Do not contact me ever again, if you do, I will press charges. Do you realize there is no statute of limitations in our state ?
You have been incredibly selfish your entire life. You have caused me intense emotional pain for many years. Leave me & my family alone. >>
suggestions ?
M 19 years, MC for 8 months, DB'd for 8 months 4 kids; 18, 15, 14, & 10 I was never meant to be a doormat. It took me years of therapy to become assertive enough to stop his abuse.
If I remember correctly, I screamed something like "I don't give a f*cking sh*t what you're feeling, or what you're mad about, or your pain, we're talking about mine right now, & I don't want to hear about yours anytime soon, take it to your counselor, that's what you pay her for". (Yep, that was me, my little ole cookie self, lol)
Holy F'ing Sh*t! Your H deserves an honorary degree in Advanced DAM Tools. He could educate some of us here!
I personally wouldn't send a letter like that, but I'm not you and haven't been through what you have.
C/Dr. thought it would give me some closure, if it's what I want. He thinks the recent phone call was trying to get a foot in the door. He thinks "dad" will call or show up, once he's done with this picture album. The idea of that sends panic straight through me.
M 19 years, MC for 8 months, DB'd for 8 months 4 kids; 18, 15, 14, & 10 I was never meant to be a doormat. It took me years of therapy to become assertive enough to stop his abuse.
Well, in that case, I'd spend a little time and make it less reactionary. Don't lash out - find apathy. You don't want him controlling your emotions, you just want to do what's best for you. Don't let him control you - recognize him as someone beneath you who doesn't deserve your time. As others have said, the opposite of love isn't anger, it's indifference.
Holy F'ing Sh*t! Your H deserves an honorary degree in Advanced DAM Tools. He could educate some of us here!
LOL, I tried to tell you guys, we had some rough "conversations". It blows my mind to look back & see what we went through & survived intact. I could tell you stories that would singe your eyebrows.
M 19 years, MC for 8 months, DB'd for 8 months 4 kids; 18, 15, 14, & 10 I was never meant to be a doormat. It took me years of therapy to become assertive enough to stop his abuse.
Well, in that case, I'd spend a little time and make it less reactionary. Don't lash out - find apathy. You don't want him controlling your emotions, you just want to do what's best for you. Don't let him control you - recognize him as someone beneath you who doesn't deserve your time. As others have said, the opposite of love isn't anger, it's indifference.
IMO. lodo
I was hoping you'd respond. I even asked you specifically in a place that shall remain nameless.
How would you word it, so that it shows indifference ?
M 19 years, MC for 8 months, DB'd for 8 months 4 kids; 18, 15, 14, & 10 I was never meant to be a doormat. It took me years of therapy to become assertive enough to stop his abuse.
