I don't want a divorce or mediation. I want the OM to vanish and her to realize what goes around comes around, the connection we share, and how she could possibly be back. however this time, I will be the man she wanted me to be. looking for a "new marriage" with my wife. its all one sided as far as I know. I got the "i love you but i'm not in love with you" probably doesn't love me at all now.
You don't control what happens. You need to be the man you want to be because she may want you to be someone that isn't good for you. She does love you. How does it help you to believe that she doesn't.
Right now, she is your entire world. As long as that's the case, it can't get better, and I don't think that you can pretend that she isn't the only thing on your mind right now.
GAL. Change your hair style, buy some new clothes in a different style. Make some new friends. Do just about anything to take your mind off of her and your situation and realize that there is more to life than the current drama.
You fight for your marriage by pulling back and not chasing her and finding joy and fulfillment in life and letting her be part of life, not the entirety of life.
Buster, everyone is giving you the same basic advice. Embrace it and grow.
