"I didn't know I was attacking, I thought I was communicating."
Sounds like my W!

"He tried to talk logically to me, pointing out ..."
Sounds like me!

"He doesn't realize these fears I have are irrational, & deep, & seared into my soul. Logic doesn't reach that depth of pain. "
He's only human! The flood of emotion gets too much for a man to handle at times; what with that new division and the mortgage. So give him a break sometimes! Maybe change your approach; remember your raincoat analogy?

FG is there a female equivalent of advanced DAM? It's not WAW wife so you need to invent something and that would define SC ;\)