Hi Neil, sorry I have not been in touch for a few days. I've had computer problems and with my short term memory (lol) I have forgotten everyone's stitch, so you may have to freshen me up.
From what I have been reading on this new thread you've started, you are talking about LL. Okay, I understand what that is all about, I think, since I read that author's book before even reading DB. The way I see it, it is much harder to do when a couple is S. I know that when I wanted to leave my H, I did not want any LL from him. I did not want him near me, nor did I want him complementing me or telling me he loved me. I wanted nothing from him. Hopefully your W is not feeling what I was at the time. You see, to me, the LL is like a lot of other programs and books out there that are often mentioned here on the board......it is when a couple are together in their M and in the same house and are trying to make the R stronger. If you are S, then that places a different perspective on things IMHO. But, then that may just be me.
Let's say that "gifts" are her LL. I like the idea of getting little inexpensive things to just let her know that you were thinking of her.......but tell me this......how can you do this as a S couple without it looking as though you are pursuing her? The same about physical touch and almost any of the LL. The best suggestion I read was about the test scores. That was impersonal and yet was a great way of giving her affirmation. It takes a wise person to know how to do that b/c it is tricky.
I don't know if this was what you wanted me to look at on your thread. If not, let me know what it was. Have you and W started dating? I may have missed that part. I tried to go back and read, but my computer is still running very slowly or else it is the board.
Anyway, that is my take on the LL. Let me hear from you.
Sandi
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
