I sent LL an e-mail...I was talking about my hysterectomy...I told him about my mood swings and all that and jokingly wrote: be glad you left! LOL! I am sure your present female company is much nicer and more beautiful than I am right now!!!
Hence his reply...
He has been saying that I 'deserve' better than he is...for a month or so...after Torito died. And he has been moving away...but I have also kinda gone dimmer in the hopes it would do something...well, it has. Now he wants to talk about 'getting there' once i 'feel better'....ugh. Not what I wanted but there it is...
I cannot stop him if he really wants to do this...but I have never wanted a divorce...and still don't. this is such a mess...
Hugs to all....
Valentine
Aug '06: H moved out July '08: H had a kid with the OW May 12 '09: emancipation day
"Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." -Ferris Bueller
Hi Vali- I just wanted to say I am sorry but you know that you have no idea what the future has in store. It sounds like LL's reply to your email was due to guilt. I am sure you struck a nerve and he feels like a schmuck for being with someone else when he know you really need him. IMO, you just need to let it go (again) and see what happens.
BFM stopped by my thread yesterday and wisely told me that I should have NO expectations...so I shouldn't expect H to divorce me, but I shouldn't expect H NOT to divorce me.
Keep praying and be calm.
God is with you sweety.
Love Cinders xxx
"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus
Upside thank you for post! I think you are right...I think that him NOT being there when Torito died and I had my surgery really DOES make him feel his guilt acutely.
You are also right when you say I have no idea what the future has in store as well...
Yes, I must let it go, once again and see what happens...
sigh....
V
Aug '06: H moved out July '08: H had a kid with the OW May 12 '09: emancipation day
"Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." -Ferris Bueller
How are you feeling, Valentine? I hope you are getting stronger every day. You are lucky not to have the angry MLCer that I do. We have been D since August 2007 and he still can find more to lash out at me about than can be believed. I used to get so upset and assume that he hated me. Well, I know my husband very well and throughout our whole marriage when he knows what he did was wrong, he gets angry and lashes out at the person he has hurt. He reacts very negatively to guilt.
I so agree with others, LL reactions is quite possibly from the guilt of not being where he should be. Take care and I hope I didn't offend by calling your H a dork in an earlier post.
Everything happens for a reason, maybe Dad needs to find that it isn't better out there, he needs to realize how good he had it here. Maybe he will find God and that is the most important thing when he finds Him he will know he is supposed to come home.
