Hi JWS! I missed you so much! I haven't gotten completely caught up with your new thread yet, but I hear you that your distance and separation is hard. You're incredibly strong though, and you can make it work for you. I LOVE the sharing custody of the puppy thing, because it gives you a regular excuse to see your W, despite the distance.
And you explaining her dreams, and your reaction to them makes a lot of sense. By the way, I hope you know that it's not true that you ruined the last 12 years of her life. That's justification on her part. However, realize now that you didn't support her dreams out of fear of losing her. Now you know that supporting her dreams is the only thing that may keep you together. There is an incredible life/love lesson in there, one I am learning as well.
People make mistakes out of fear. Some people never learn to do anything different, they just keep jumping from one relationship to the next, always with the same fears. Not you. You're becoming a person capable of more love than fear. It's an incredible gift to your wife as well as yourself.
It is in the shelter of each other that people live.--Irish proverb
