Mulesqb - Can the sun shine on a donkey's a$$?

[mulesqb]

Hey Phoenix - It's just the wives going - my neighbor will be home - but we won't give him the time of day.

Believe me - all the ideas are already in my head, so don't worry. That was my night of staring at the ceiling last night and then praying that she has enough of her real self still inside her to not do anything stupid. I do know that my W is somewhat repulsed by the neighbor's W. She keeps hinting to me that she doesn't want to go.

The kids know that since my W is not going to be home there is no way they have to worry about spending time with them. My neighbor has asked if we can hang out that weekend - I pretty much brushed him off.

My only hope is that my W does her usual thing when she travels. She gets homesick right away. I'm hoping that happens and she misses us. She is already complaining about the 3 hour ride and the possibility of hitting traffic.

[mulesqb]

Then again, I'm a sick puppy.

I was actually able to get a good chuckle out of that!

[The Wifey]

Sorry to jump in here. Just my two pennies. My h told me that if I felt a need to have a PA with someone else to just not tell him about it. (H is the WA) I told him it is not ever going to happen, and I am NOT saying the same to you. I told him in no uncertain terms that an A affair would be my bottom line.

I am willing to go through this with him while he thinks, and tries to figure himself out, his inner happiness and peace, etc, but that an A is not acceptable.

I also said that if he feels the need that I am here for him. He cried when I said it. What a surprise it was.

[mulesqb]

I know Bill - but I can't stomach the thought. The two of us have always taken great pride in the fact that we are the only ones we've ever been with. That will be a life altering occurrence for me - would never be able to look at her the same. She's already so different from the person i know - I don't think I would ever be able to...well let's not go there for now.

I did ask her parents to be patient and stop trying to fix her. They agreed but they are very frustrated and sad. I had that exact conversation about alienating her and destroying everything if they went through with this. I think they get it. For them this has gone on for a couple of years. My W shut them out 2 years ago, really for no reason. When i tried to talk to her about it, she got mad and we never resolved it.

I'm praying for a good counseling session for her today - I just have a good feeling about it - I mean why not?? At some point this dark cloud has to finish spilling it's rain, right??

[mulesqb]

Hey Wifey - Did he have a PA?? My W knows that's the dealbreaker for me. I'm wondering if I need to reiterate it to her soon. Anytime we have brought up another man or a PA - she says "don't you think that I have enough morals in me, that that would never happen".

[mulesqb]

Hey guys - quick question - last week Phoenix's W suggested that I ask my W whether she considers herself my W or my roommate right now. She said she was curious what the answer would be. I have been thinking about it and don't know what she would say. Do you think I should stay away from talk like that right now??? Or do you think it would be useful to find out what her thinking is?? Curious what you guys think - seems like R talk to me.

[Bworl]

Do you think I should stay away from talk like that right now??

Yes.

[mulesqb]

ok - my lips are sealed.

[faithisbelieving]

Could child protective services be called in if your boys parents were caught smoking some dope somewhere

Don't ever doubt that this could be used against you in a court of law....that the truth could be twisted and your kids taken away from you.

N.B.
Pre-filing
MIL: -those kids deserve a hot cooked meal
-FIB, you should know something, XXX always had difficulty admitting that she was wrong when she was a child

Post-filing:
-"it's the world according to FIB"
-seated across from me in court in a black dress

Pre-filing:
FIL: XXX...REMEMBER YOUR VOWS.
-those women she is hanging out with are white-trash and leading her the wrong way

Post-filing:
-you broke her spirit
-subpoena shows up unannounced for small claims court

Maybe my DB'ing was bad....maybe, according to many here, I should have stood forever. Part of your growth is living in the real world....and..living with a confused woman in MLC.

Live as if:
-you want your M to be saved
-that you MAY have to go on without her
-that you ALWAYS were a good husband
-she still loves you
-that under different circumstances, she may try to hurt you
-you ARE a wonderful father and that a N.U.T. of yours is that you will do anything in your power to keep your children safe

Don't smoke pot.
Don't buy it.
Go on record with her that you are against it
Don't sanction it's use.

Tell her you you'd rather get high....living a new life with her.

FIB

[faithisbelieving]

PS

Kudos to wifey...defining boundaries. In her support, I have told my W:
-"another OM is a dealbreaker"
-and when she accused me, "I'M MARRIED...I DON'T CHEAT ON MY W."

Infidelity is not "OK" when you are in MLC and/or married.

FIB