I am scared about what could happen on this trip. But what can I do about it other than detach and enjoy my kids
You could have stopped right there.
Don't start borrowing trouble. And I know, we've helped you along that path with our warnings. Furthermore, don't presume to know that if something bad did happen that you would be ready to call it quits. You honestly have no idea right now. Our love for our spouse is an amazing thing, and when you factor in the years and their role as parent...well, just don't think you know right now how you would ultimately respond.
As for her parents, I would express my appreciation for their love, support, and concern, and then gently ask them to back off from their daughter. Intervention looks good on TV as a dramatic evening fare, but in the case of MLC doesn't play out so well. She's not on crack, she's not burying her face in a bottle of liquor or pills. She's a functioning (though not always well) woman, wife, and mother. You'd catch hell in court trying to prove otherwise.
I understand their concern. But they can't do anymore than you can on this one. And in their efforts they could very well both alienate themselves from their daughter (which you could likely be blamed for later) and drive a further wedge between your wife and you and the boys.
They need to try to understand this for what it is. A crisis of the soul. A point in your wife's life where, for whatever reason, nothing makes sense, nothing satisfies, and nothing is right. A point where the quest for peace and the ability to FEEL anything is the driving force.
Be thankful that she continues with her counseling and urge them to let this run it's course.
Blessings,
Bill
"Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon."
