Yes. You show her by ACTIONS, not WORDS. Other than little "truth darts" a couple of times a week, you won't be able to reach her with words. "You can't teach an adulterer" is something I learned early on (that and "all cheaters lie" were SO true!). So you show her by your actions that you are the man of integrity and character and strength that she would want to be with.
When she asks you why you're doing it, you say "Because I'm trying to save my marriage, and I took my vows seriously" or something similar.
Puppy
I am defitiely trying that, but am struggling with how to show that I can be what she is wanting (because as have heard before, she does not believe I can change). She wants emotional connection, conversation about non-fluff stuff, etc. Tough to do with actions and not words.
OK, I see what you're saying here. That IS a tough, tough one.
My suggestion would be to give her GLIMPSES of that ability, but no more. Say, once a week you sit and have a really nice, long, validating, listening conversation with her, just to flex that relationship muscle and show it off to her.
Then you pull way back.
I'd welcome others' thoughts, but that would be mine.
