Lightbulb and Castanets Moments

[Gypsy]

Thanks for the vote of confidence, Ms. Sunny-licious..

I don't want this,
I don't want the man person he is now..

I'll get in a place where I can make 'healthy' choices and go from there.

*hugs*

[L21959]

((Gypsy))

I think being healthy is the key

So true...spoken like the DB queen (not the DQ) you are!! Being healthy, even when the WAS is trying to pull us down with them into their own sick stew of pain...

And I second the vote on SUnnyJ's name!

THanks for being around tonight...

L2

[Gypsy]

Hey Lady of the L's..

I'm glad I was of some help. Good job asking for it!*hugs*

One other thing I avoid is not calling my spouse by initials.. H, WAS, STBX. Although it's convenient, it depersonalizes them, feels like passive/aggressive name calling. It also forces me to think.. who in the heck is that person?

My current mode of reference is dropping any possessive pronouns.. like 'my'. He's not 'my' spouse.. he's 'spouse'. It almost happens naturally. The kids are 'my' kids. When he stops slicing them out of his life and takes care of their wellbeing, I find it write 'our' kids.

Initials remove the need to feel sometimes when I need to most.

*hugs*

[Gypsy]

Holy crap..

Reading Codependent No More is like a day at a gym of 2x4's. I've been so busy checking off codependent behaviors I have a cramp in my hand.

It certainly is an eye openner for me and a helpful guide in how to be healthy.

*hugs*

[SunnySeason]

Thanks for the morning laugh Gypsy,

"Reading Codependent No More is like a day at a gym of 2x4's. I've been so busy checking off codependent behaviors I have a cramp in my hand."

I can just picture you, after coffee, armed with your Sharpie, furiously checking those boxes.

Some parts of introspection can be kinda fun....kinda.

Sunny

[Purple]

My copy of that book is so dog eared that it needs a kennel!

[L21959]

Adding that to the order i'm making today... along with "Women who run with wolves"... that one looks a little more groovy to me, but we'll see...

[The Wifey]

Gypsy, I don't know. I don't want people to just agree with me and look at my H as the big stinky dog. I know my part in our trouble. No one gets into these problems from just one person. People keep saying I will get angry, but I honestly haven't found any anger.

Today I feel peace. I like me, who I am. I have decided just to love my H with no expectations. I've laid myself bare in front of him. Figuratively and literally, in case you wonder. I could get completely shattered, who knows.

The problems were not all his doing. It is his issue that he wanted to walk, not mine. But, the problems were ours. All I can do is listen and tell and show him I love him.

Time will tell what effect it will have.

[Gypsy]

Hey Ms Sunny..

Woe is me.. I can't 'do' coffee or onions.

That book also has little assignments to do at the end of a chapter. That's when I decide it's nap time. My my, aren't I the lil passive/aggressive one!

How are you doing?

*hugs*

[Gypsy]

"My copy of that book is so dog eared that it needs a kennel! "

*howling*

*hugs*