I'd say the rule is there is no rule. Besides, aren't you going to church for another reason other than worrying about how things may appear by sitting beside single women or not.
Tom, I think we have the makings of a new thread, the top ten reasons to be alone! I love your "Top Ten"...anyone else wanna play? Oh btw, I don't even own a boat cover but if I wanted to I could!
This is from a woman's perspective, of course. 10. Your shoe inventory is nobody's business but your own (my favourite reason - I know, I know) 9. The only mess in your home is your own mess! (Of course, this is assuming you have never married and had children) 8. Peace of mind (no more wondering what he meant when he said whatever, or trying to interpret his needs without him actually saying something, and so many other reasons) 7. Any night is girls' night 6. You don't have to deal with in-laws 5. It's all about you, all the time (sounds selfish, but when you want to get involved in a charity or something, then you can without consultation) 4. That big, comfortable bed is ALL yours 3. Birthdays and special occasions will never be forgotten 2. Your entertainment options will always be entertaining to you 1. Independence: That's hot!
Not sure if I agree with all of these, but with some --- definitely. I do have to remind myself, sometimes, that I am trying to piece, but the single option is looking pretty good and tempting.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
For myself, I would just change "shoes" to "books", I never worried about the in-laws as they are in China but we really did get along great cuz they couldn't speak English...we just smiled alot! As for "any night is girls night out" well, I guess that stays because they are all out... just without me!
Anyway, my D11 just gave me a handmade card tonight and it reads:
Dear Daddy, I will miss you when we are gone to China, thank you for taking us to the airport! I love you and you are the best daddy in the whole universe. I will see you soon and I love you lots!!! XOXOXOXO Sincerely, D11 P.S. I love you!
What's your living arrangement? Is you W. in the house and are you in an apartment? How's that working? Speaking of books, how is your concentration? I Often have trouble reading books (also a passion of mine) recently. What happens to the house in the divorce? There are a lot of options for that, I understand. Good luck without the kids. They'll be back soon enough. Any more laundry room encounters?
I have a 2 bedroom a few blocks from STBX. I allowed STXW to buy me out of the house because she would be more able to keep up payments on the mortgage that would need to be taken out as she earns more. I did not want the kids to have to deal with mom and dad separating and then the loss of their home too! No way. I also didn't want to live my life a cash stapped home owner who couldn't do anything but sit in his backyard for fun. Our home was paid off so she had to take out a mortgage to pay me off, so I'm sitting on a nice little wad of cash! Now, the kids spend one week with me and one with my STBX. My lawyer says it is a very unusual arrangement as males tend to get screwed. In all fairness, my STBX knows I am a good father and that my kids would suffer if I wasn't allowed equal time. She was very co-operative so that is also a good reason to keep things as friendly as possible, it's best for parenting arrangements. Now, as for concentration, it will come back FLTC, you've been though so much and it's normal to be in a haze for awhile. I had trouble sleeping the first month or so, I would sleep about 3 or 4 hours a night for a couple in a row and then pass out for 10 hours, just accept it and know that it will get back to normal. It's a traumatic journey, FLTC but just try to remember what my Coffee Buddy said to me, and I will always be grateful for, "no matter how bad it gets, it will always get better"...it will FLTC, it will. Btw, I'm on the ninth floor too!
Thanks, wii. I feel the same about the house, but I make almost 3x what W. does. She takes care of the kids basic needs very well and keeps them organized and focused, but as I've said before, everything is a "12 on a 10 point scale" with her, whether it's a napkin not in the kids' lap whe they eat, or a hairbrush left on a counter.(The funny part about this one is the house is usually a mess, so i't selective zeroing in. Bizarre)
Same here. You've read about my relationship with my kids. My S10 and I are inseparable, and my D's are hot and cold with W. She also knows this, and would not want to prevent me from seeing them all that I could. The part that su&ks is the additional commotion this introduces into an already out of control schedule with three kids and two full time jobs.
What is tough for me is that I could not afford an apartment in the town where we live. We moved here 14 years ago and could not afford a starter home today. Our house has appreciated about 350K from what we paid for it, so living part time with me is hard, because of school. I purposely took the apt because it's only 6 miles from the kids and 10 from work. It is already better at times. I used to not be able to even sit in my house, because I would literally crawl out of my own skin. This also used to happen at work. I literally could not sit in place. Things su&k, but at least now, are mostly manageable.
Once I lost the fear of a divorce, I also began to lose fear of the beast that was my W. I don't really care if she's offended or if I've yet again made the wrong move. It's not about me. She is a twisted soul. For comic relief, read some of my posts back around October of 06. She makes you W. look highly predictive.
Is the bloom still on or off the rose ? Is she budding or wilting in the warm glow of summer ? Are her blossoms robust and fragrant or are the petals each removing themselves one by one in the breeze.. Will pollenation ever occur during the growing season ??
Here's a list I got off 