Yes please, I'd like the data stream & tennis analogy both.
Am typing the 'discounting' & "countering' paragraphs to send. thanks for the support.
I mentioned to FG that it drove me nuts when h would constantly interrupt. He explained that men think in a data stream, that if it's stopped, or interrupted, they can't get back to it. Women think in more related thoughts, if we get interrupted most of the time we can get back to it. So now, if I'm talking & H jumps in with his data stream, I just try to cut him slack since this is how his brain works. I do come back in with "as I was saying" so that he realizes I was in mid-sentence. But I don't lash out with "[censored], you interrupted me again".
Tennis. This is from back in July. H would ask me to play tennis (have a discussion) he had hundreds of balls, & both racquets, & a serving machine. I had no racquet, had never had tennis lessons, & I thought we were going to have a nice fun easy game of tennis. He starts serving balls as fast as he can. I'm trying to return them. He blocks, he diverts, he smashes, he serves another ball before I can return the first one, (with my hand cause remember I don't have a racquet). I told him this analogy, & told him I was walking off the court, & he could play by himself. When he wanted a nice easy relaxing fun game of tennis, let me know. I wasn't into kill or be killed tennis. make sense ? I probably typed it better to him in an e-mail, I'll see if I can find it. It was totally drop the rope before I knew what rope was.
hugs. I have the agreement already typed onto my laptop, if you want me to e=mail it to you.
M 19 years, MC for 8 months, DB'd for 8 months 4 kids; 18, 15, 14, & 10 I was never meant to be a doormat. It took me years of therapy to become assertive enough to stop his abuse.
