Yes, she is guilty. She doesn't like you pulling from her. She wants you to be "ok" with her leaving. If you are "ok", she will be "OK". I remember saying, "He's finally feeling the same way and it is getting easier." Not sure you want her to feel "ok" with this, h4h. She didn't want you to give her a rub because she feels guilty getting anything from you when she is treating you awfully.
Your talks are good I think because you tend to not want to talk but to dream about how it really is....this way, it is out in the open for both of you. Puppy's truth darts toward her might be good right now. Believe me, she WANTS you to make this easy on her because of the guilt. She also has herself thinking that she shouldn't be with you because she "doesn't love you".
h4h, if she leaves, ..........I really don't think you want her to leave. I really don't think you want that.
