I think for now you should stay dark. That usually brings him back in a week or so. If not, then you have your answer, he is having more fun with his new life. If he comes back you can try to negotiate with him.
I like the ultimatum except the I love you, I adore you part. A bit over the top. I don't think I could sell that kind of talk to my husband and we are getting along swimmingly.
