Is this what healing feels like ???

[smartcookie]

fb2, this is good, I need to know what you guys need to know....asking questions helps me to stay focused.

For starters, he didn't go from terrible to enlightened in 2-3 months. It's been 13 months of growth now for him. He was terrible back in May '07. I wrote him a letter telling him I was done trying to make our relationship good. He agreed to go to Counseling with me. He agreed to sign a non-abuse agreement contract. He agreed to read the books I asked him to. The books enlightened him. He had no idea that he was abusive. The books laid it out for him. He did all this FINALLY because he thought I was leaving for OM. He was dying inside.

I stayed & gave him the opportunity to change, because I had OM coaching me & telling me how to get H to change. We talked often about how he was teaching me to kick H's *ss. Then I changed counselors in October, & the current psychologist helped me understand things that OM couldn't.

I can teach any woman how to kick her H's *ss. I can teach any DAM how to not be a DAM. What took the most amount of time is developing my self-esteem to believe that I deserved to be treated like a Queen in my own home. What takes the most time/patience with the man is him believing that when he treats her like a Queen, he reaps benefits beyond his imagination.

I sent H an e-mail in January, I told him that if he would trust me to take charge of our relationship, that I promised him a relationship most men only dream of. I reminded him that women have the relationship manual in their head. I asked him if he was willing to follow my lead, to respect my knowledge, that if he relinquished his ego & pride, that he'd be happier than he could imagine.

If you asked him today I believe he'd say....he's happier than he ever imagined he could be.

next question...