I just read your entire thread this evening and must commend you for your strength, patience and fortitude. Your W does not deserve you. Your kids are lucky to have you.
Keep working on yourself. I don't know how many times I read the book of Proverbs. I think I just liked God's divine words speaking toward my now-ex's actions as foolish.
Subsquently, I prayed for Wisdom...and later Wisdom and Strength...and later for Wisdom, Stregth, Perserverence...and later passion (for life)....
Regardless of whether your marriage is saved or not, this episode will forever change your life.