2 weeks to get ready for The R Talk......

[job]

A,
It's very normal for the both of you to fill ill about this situation. His is guilt and confusion over what he would like to do, but hasn't gotten up the nerve to do it. He wants to continue holding on to the lifeline that is tied to your apron string and yet be out there exploring the world as a "carefree" man. The depression will also create a lot of ilness for him as he progresses down the path of MLC as well.

You are anxious about what you think will transpire on the 17th. It's normal. When we don't have contact w/them, we are able to regain our balance a bit and pretend that things are going along okay. However, when we know that we are going to have to contact w/them, it will put your entire system into knots. Why? Because the person you knew isn't the same person you are dealing w/right now. Yes, they look the same, but they are going to be the complete opposite of what they were before the switch was hit. It's called the "mirror image". You are going to have to find a way to think of him as the neighbor or a cousin visiting in order to get through this.

Your h can't be cold or angry right now because he's in the very early stages. As he progresses through the crisis, he may very well turn angry when he realizes what he's about to lose, i.e., money, financial standards, etc. As long as the boat isn't rocked very hard, they don't usually exhibit the anger. But, the more you push, the harder they will pull back and believe me, if you pin him to the wall, he's going to come out swinging in time.

Now, you need to try to focus on something other than your h for today. Find a good movie to go see, go window shopping, visit a friend, etc. But do something to help you take the focus off of him and the meeting for just a little bit.

I'm sorry you are feeling sick and nervous about the upcoming meeting. Stay positive, it may not turn out the way you think it might.